Potter versus Evans: A Love Story
by Anna12
Summary: James and Lily, seventh year. A story for those who love James and Lily stories. love/hate. Both points of view. Reading and reviewing welcome. Also, I apologize - the program turned my elipses into periods. Looks horrible, please ignore till fixed.
1. Chapter One

1  
  
The pounding of footsteps echoed in the hallways - the pursuer and the chased sped down the otherwise silent corridors. With only sound to guide him, Lucius Malfoy heard a crash and hints of running to his left, towards the dungeon staircase. Immediately he veered down this path, desperate to catch the person who had broken into his trunk. There was something missing, something that belonged to him.  
  
After a moment he paused, listened. Slowly he backed into the shadow a new moon provided; next to a statue. There was silence. In the dark he tapped his fingers together, waiting. His breath was heavy, he slowed and quieted it. He could feel them coming. Up from the staircase that lead to the potions classrooms. They must think he had ran past the entrance, and this was their chance for escape. Lucius wished he had seen them, seen who had rifled though his things. He didn't know how he managed, but he caught up to them in the hall. At every turn they eluded him, every corner they were one step ahead. He felt he had been chasing a phantom. His only glance had been at the corner of a robe. The fingers on his right hand tapped faster, his muscles tense. They were coming now, he could feel it.  
  
Suddenly there was a scream, cut short and muffled. Lucius stared at the staircase in confusion, and waited. There was no other sound. No one appeared from the dungeon entrance. Still though, felt it, felt them coming. Reaching out one hand he touched the air in front of him, waved it around, expecting something. Minutes passed. Frustrated he trekked down into the potions classrooms, searching each room. Nothing. With an inconsolable rage his fist came down on a desk, and struck off several beakers and containers in one motion. He realized he had yelled in his anger. If he was not careful, Flitch and his cat would find him.  
  
Slinking back to his house common room, Malfoy began to hatch a plan.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Lily cried out at the hand that appeared out of nowhere, covering her mouth and pulling her into a dark corner. She struggled, but eventually lost and found herself taken underneath what appeared to be a blanket - a blanket with somebody under it? There had been no one in the room, she was sure she had checked. Now all she could see was the uniform of a boy and a tie as he held her to him.he was tall, he wore Gryffindor colors. Frozen, she waited, as he seemed to listen. As he removed his hand from her mouth, his other hand tilted her head to face him. James Potter. Lily hated James Potter.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Lily Evans. James hated Lily Evans. He had seen her enter the dungeon earlier; he had donned his invisibility cloak and watched Malfoy pause at the entrance. James observed the Slytherin for a few seconds before going after Lily. He put her hand over her mouth to quiet her - there was no way he was going to let someone from his house get in trouble because of a Slytherin, they couldn't afford to lose house points this year, not when the race was already close. She fought him, throwing out a pretty good punch. He dodged and pulled her under the cloak, listening to see if Malfoy heard the noise and was coming down the stairs. There was nothing. James looked down and saw one of his hands still over Lily's mouth, the other tangled in her long red hair. He took the first hand off, guided her eyes to his, and put one finger to his mouth to indicate the need for quiet. A moment of suspicion flickered in her eyes, the green appeared for a moment startlingly bright, he could see the doubt in her expression. She said nothing, only took his other hand and tossed it out of her hair in defiance. Amused and annoyed at her implication, he pointed towards the staircase and moved towards it, motioning her to follow.  
  
As they crept up the staircase and in front of a sculpture, James turned and Lily opened her mouth to speak. His eyes became wide as he reached to silence her. Behind her and out of a sliver of darkness one of Malfoy's hands was reaching dangerously close to her shoulder. Lily turned to see what James was looking at, and was confronted with a pair of icy blue eyes, angry, searching. The words about to escape her lips came only as a gasp as loud as a whisper. Still under the invisibility of the cloak and suppressing a scream, she stumbled backwards. After making a quick judgment call, James scooped up the stupefied Lily and carried her quietly around the corner.  
  
After setting her down and receiving a dirty look from Miss Evans they continued on the back route towards the Gryffindor common room. As they climbed the last staircase to the tower, a crash and cry from the silence below startled them both. Almost is unison, their heads turned towards the spiral of the steps, twisting into the dark below. They looked at one another, and then away.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Lily whispered angrily at the portrait of the Fat Lady. "Camaro." The Fat Lady yawned and replied "I can't hear you dear, what's that you say?"  
  
James stood next to her, apparently oblivious to the fact the Fat Lady was developing a hearing impairment.  
  
"What is a Camaro anyways? Who came up with that for a password?"  
  
"It's a car Potter - CA-MAR-O," Lily ended her sentence in as loud a voice as she dared.  
  
"Oh - oh yes yes, sorry dear," the Fat Lady apologized as the portrait swung open.  
  
"So all muggle cars are a Camaro - " wondered James, watching Lily out of the corner of his eye. When she moved to brush her hair behind her ear the sleeve of her robe slid down to reveal a deep cut on her left forearm. He felt uneasy at the sight of it.  
  
"No, no they're - you know what, nevermind. I'm going to bed. Goodnight," called back a tired Lily.  
  
"Oh no you don't Evans - " James followed her steps. He was curious now. "Not until you tell me how it is you happened to be wandering the hallways so late at night, and what you were doing in the potions dungeon, and now that I stop and think of it, you almost lost our house quite a few points -"  
  
"-Potter," Lily interrupted, turning and walking quite close to the much taller boy. Her eyes took on the fiery sheen they had in the dungeon.  
  
"If I were you," she said, taking his tie in her hand, and pulling him down to her level, "I wouldn't be asking questions. Nothing I've done today can possibly compete with that cloak you're holding, and I wonder.what were you doing wandering the hallways so late at night?"  
  
She released his tie and resumed her walk up to the girls dormitory. She wasn't going to let James Potter intimidate or scare her. The nerve, really. Why was she in the hallway? Did Potter own the hallway? Only he must be allowed to roam it illegally at night with a stupid invisibility cloak.why not, he was allowed to do everything else. James Potter, the Golden Boy of Hogwarts. She laughed at her own mental imagery of James, pressed against the stone wall of the corridor as Filch and his cat slunk past.James Potter, draped in what looked to be something like her grandmas old curtains. Lily laughed. Yes, James Potter, how impressive.  
  
*  
  
James did not move and inch from the position Lily Evans and pulled him into. Even after she left, he remained, a little taken aback. He remembered the green eyes, the smooth voice, and the unmistakable arrogance of that damn Evans. He had just saved her from getting in some serious trouble, where did she get off treating him like the enemy? Things were not so easy with her as they were with others. He walked up to the dorm room and climbed into his bed. Only Sirius and Peter were there.  
  
"James?" came a voice from the bed adjacent to his own.  
  
"Yeah Sirius."  
  
"Did you see anything?" his best friend mumbled sleepily as he turned on his side. James lay back on his bed and put his hands behind his head.  
  
"Yeah, I guess you could say that," James replied.  
  
"Really? What?"  
  
James ignored the question. "Tell me what you know about Lily Evans."  
  
"Lily? Well if you haven't lived under a rock for the past six years she sleeps the next hallway over, Remus and I are friends with her, and." he yawned, "you two have never gotten along. You both think you know everything," he paused. "Am I forgetting anything - oh yeah you probably can't see her over the hoardes of women that mob you daily - " James thought. "When we were second years I accidentally turned her hair blue in potions class."  
  
Sirius laughed. "Yeah I remember that - good times."  
  
"She found a way to make all of my shoes disappear, and then the next day I woke up with no eyebrows," James continued. Sirius was practically hyperventilating with laughter.  
  
"Yes! And then when you fell asleep in class Remus drew some on with a permanent marker," he cried, gasping for air.  
  
"Yeah well, I think Miss Evans may be trouble," James added.  
  
"Trouble? Lily? James, at worst she has a temper. You're not always a shining example of goodness yourself. You know what I think - I think she gets under your skin. That's why you two always fight like cats and dogs."  
  
James started. "Under my skin - only if you're referring to the fact that she is lacking of any good qualities."  
  
"Oh James, don't say that. You're just mad because she got more O.W.L.s than you. And that she's the only person, besides myself I might add, to ever put you in your place." He thought for a moment. "I think this is the start of something ugly James. You don't want to go to war with Lily Evans."  
  
"She beat me by one. One O.W.L." James turned to go to sleep. There was silence as he drifted off, his anger at the red head fading with fatigue. He could hear Peter snoring and the grandfather clock ticking, and slowly his consciousness was slipping. He was jarred awake by a giggle.  
  
"Permanent marker, that's funny - "  
  
"Shutup Sirius." 


	2. Chapter Two

2  
  
The next morning found Lily Evans eating a bowl of oatmeal at the Gyrffindor table in the dining room. Next to her sat her friends Arabella Figg (Belle) and Eva Thompson. Arabella was on the Quidditch team with James. She was a Keeper, he was a Chaser and the team captain. She waved at him as he sat down, and Lily looked over. Immediately three girls from Gyrffindor and a couple of Ravenclaw girls moved to sit next to or around him. There was a game Saturday; the whole school was quite excited.  
  
"You know, Lily," said Belle through a mouthful of cornflakes, "I hear it's between you and James this year for top grades for our class. No one else can catch up with you two by now, it looks like you'll have to fight it out."  
  
Eva followed Lily's gaze to the throng of James's admirers. "Yeah Lily, and I hear James is really advanced in Transfiguration, you may actually have competition," she said.  
  
Lily looked at the two and then laughed. "Potter? You really think that I'd lose to Potter?" Lily scoffed. She knew he was all show, the only things Lily ever saw him do were tricks and flirt with countless girls.  
  
"You have to admit he is better than you in Transfiguration - remember that time he turned your book into a big log?" Belle suggested.  
  
"Yes, and I didn't find it particularly impressive," Lily said as she shot an angry glance at the culprit down the table. James watched Remus spoon a stackfull of pancakes onto his plate, laughed and shook his head. He was tall, with messy black hair and grey eyes. In class he wore glasses for reading, but now he wore them more and more often.  
  
"Look, James Potter may be the captain of the Quidditch team and a bit influential with the student body, and ok, he may be good at transfiguration. But I'll have you know that he is as overrated as he is conceited and I will take immense pleasure in watching him lose," she asserted.  
  
Eva smiled. Lily was a kind person and well liked, but she had a fiery temper. She had never met anyone else who successfully mastered the combination of being logical and blindly passionate at the same time. And then there was Arabella, who was delighted at the possibility of seeing Lily succeed in defeating James - he had been holding some particularly hard Quidditch practices lately.  
  
"He's a slave driver Lily. Turn his bookbag into a duck," Belle suggested.  
  
"No, no Lily, don't listen to her," Ava said as she gave Belle a shove, "You two are really alike in a creepy way - "  
  
"Very funny, as if I actually like the Every Flavor Beans that taste like Furniture Polish - and date practically the entire Hogwarts female student body, oh, and leave my dirty socks in the common room," Lily recounted.  
  
"Actually I think that was Peter," said Belle absentmindedly.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"His mom writes his name on them." Belle started laughing.  
  
Eva sighed. "Anyways, as I was saying, be careful Lily. James Potter may not be such a pushover," she warned.  
  
"Oh Eva." Lily smoothed her friend's hair. "Don't worry about me, it's all in good fun." But she had a mischievous glint in her eye.  
  
"I suppose that evil look you have would have nothing to do with the fact we have dueling club on Friday, right?" asked Eva.  
  
"No," exclaimed Lily in a mockingly horrified tone. "What kind of person do you take me for Eva?" She shook her head and walked away, trailing off with, "Can't believe it - me? No - "  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Alice Rowley was giggling at whatever James said. He had just asked Remus to pass the orange juice and she was thrown into a fit of laughter. Remus gave James the sympathy look and continued eating his pancakes. Across the room he saw Evans get up and start to walk of the dining room, laughing. Just looking at her started a fire in his stomach, the annoyance he felt waning last night came back full force. Sirius caught his eye, looked towards Lily. Seeing her as she went for the door he waved and caught her attention. She smiled and waved back.  
  
"Hi Lily!" he screamed across the room. She yelled back.  
  
"Hi Sirius!" she shouted. James hit him on the shoulder.  
  
"What are you doing??" James demanded.  
  
"Saying hi to Lily," Sirius explained with a big grin on his face. James was upset, Sirius was amused. James suddenly understood.  
  
"Oh just you wait for dueling club Black," he challenged.  
  
"I will destroy you Potter," mumbled Sirius while eating his eggs, obviously unafraid.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Divination. Not the most popular class at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy, however, as most seven years need electives to take, a large portion of the oldest Gryffindor year was gathered in Madame Trelawny's Tower.  
  
Delighted that it made James uncomfortable, Sirius and Lily had partnered up for the day, Belle and Eva were together, James was with a HufflePuff girl and Remus was missing, having opted for an independent study in Defense Against the Dark Arts instead. As was the common practice, the students were concocting several categories of predictions for each other that pleased Madame Trelawny: the others untimely death, the death of each other's family members and or family pet, and the weather.  
  
"Ahhh I see," said Sirius.  
  
"What, what?" cried Lily in fake anticipation. Sirius raised one eyebrow and stared the crystal ball.  
  
"It's going to be sunny on Thursday," he concluded.  
  
"Oh," replied Lily, "and I see here that your Aunt Mildred will be overrun by a herd of buffalo. Sad, sad death."  
  
"I don't think we have any buffalo," chimed in Eva. But she was soon quieted by Madame Trelawny, who was trying to get the attention of the class.  
  
"Class we are going to continue to do predictions, however we are going to add another element into our technique. I see you have chosen your own partners, however I will be pairing each of you with another student whom I feel has similar or complementary energy to your own. You will be working with your new partner for the next few weeks until we conclude our unit on predictions and prophecies," the professor explained.  
  
It was commonly known and joked about on campus that Trelawny may possibly have a few screws loose. James looked at Sirius, who was moving quite close to the Hufflepuff girl next to him, asking in a deep voice if perhaps they shared the same "energy." Belle started examining her nails, Eva counted the tiles on the ceiling. Trelawny looked them all over one by one. Slowly she began to pair them. Eva got stuck with a HufflePuff boy and somehow Belle and Sirius ended up together.  
  
Immediately they began to hover over the ball, making big motions with their hands. Belle put on a bandana and squinted her eyes. Pair after pair, eventually all that was left was Lily, James, his Hufflepuff partner (whose name Lily thought may have been Ann), and Peter, who walked into class late.  
  
James looked at Peter and the other girl, confident that the Professor would place him with one of those two people. There is no way that Trelawny, as loopy as she was, would make the mistake of putting himself and Evans together.  
  
"Ah. This is easy. Lily and James - Peter and Angela (An-gela Lily thought.)" But neither Lily or James said a word. Fuming, both moved and sat at their table with their ball. Lily's arms were crossed, James faced the other way.  
  
"Alright class, continue on," instructed Trelawny. Lily looked at James.  
  
"Go ahead," she said.  
  
"Fine," said James, looking at the ball. He could think of nothing to say to Lily, just sitting across from her was punishment.Then he came to a realization, and changed his expression. "Hmmm - interesting Evans. Very interesting."  
  
Lily turned and looked at him. "What?" she asked with suspicious eyes.  
  
"Very interesting," continued James.  
  
"What? Tell me."  
  
"Well, besides the fact it's going to rain on Saturday.I see a tragedy occurring," he explained. Lily looked somewhat interested, so he continued. "I see - I see - wait - here it is. It's you, but you have blue hair - and you're running around screaming like a banshee, my, that's definitely not your color - "  
  
Lily remembered when James had turned her hair blue. "Oh really?" she asked.  
  
"Yes, yes," said James. "Oh and it looks as if your pet hamster has met his demise. I'll spare you the details, but, oh poor Randolf - "  
  
Lily was angry. She knew she had looked quite bad with that blue hair, it had taken a week to get it out with every spell she could think of. In addition, she wasn't going to give James the satisfaction of telling him that she in fact had a pet hamster at home, although he was not dead and she certainly did not name him Randolf.  
  
"James, wait, wait, I think I see something here too."  
  
"You do?" he replied, not used to hearing her call him James.  
  
"Yes," Lily said sweetly. She smiled and looked again into the ball. "Yep, here it is. James, I see your death."  
  
There was a pause. "Is that right," he said.  
  
"Yes, I see it but I have to figure out what happened. It was.It was a heart attack. Yes a heart attack. But how could that have happened at such a young age? Hmmm - let's see - I wasn't stress from studying, that's for sure," Lily paused, looked a James, and laughed for a moment. "Let's see, it's not Quidditch," she paused and squinted at the ball. "Oh yes, it's right here. I see you under a cloak of sorts, sneaking out at night to meet one of your many, many lady friends. Heading off towards the Astronomy Tower, yes. Past Filtch and Mrs. Norris, but what's this? There's so many girls you're snogging that you can't keep track; panic, and have a heart attack? That is so sad James. So sad."  
  
James glared at her through a barely veiled hate. "You think that I'm out at night meeting girls?"  
  
Lily laughed. "And when I use a plural I mean plural - "  
  
"You - " said James, his voice almost shaking, "Have no idea what I am doing out at night nor would someone as selfish and arrogant as you ever understand. And what right do you have to criticize me anyways? You were wandering around too if you haven't forgotten - "  
  
"Have I hit a soft spot James?" asked Lily in an innocent voice. "And I am sure that my reasons for being in the hall may have some kind of moral superiority to your make out fest with the entire sixth year population," she shot back. "Besides, why do you even care? I'm not talking about Quidditch or women so why do you even give a damn?"  
  
"You're just jealous," James said quietly.  
  
"Me?? Jealous? Oh James, you're so mixed up its pathetic. Tell me, what is it about me that bothers you the most, the fact that I find you completely devoid of charm or the fact that I see though the shiny exterior that most girls throw themselves at?" Lily replied.  
  
She found herself leaning over the table on her elbows as her voice became elevated. James saw her eyes blazing. He was not going to back down. He too leaned across the table inches from her face and spoke in a soft but heated voice. Lily saw it in his eyes as well, the gray color seem to cloud over into a charcoal black.  
  
"First of all you don't know what you're talking about. Secondly, you're jealous that there are people that want to be with me, and perhaps you can't say the same. And lastly, I saved you the other night. You know what I mean. You're pretty ungrateful Evans, you know that?"  
  
"You grab me out of a shadowy corner and you want me to thank you? I skulk around with you under a blanket, you pick me up and carry me wherever you want and I'm supposed to thank you?" Lily's fist clenched. "You probably weren't worried about me James, you were probably worried about losing house points." Lily saw a flash of guilt in the grey eyes. "I'm right aren't I?"  
  
James quickly hid his emotion. "Maybe I should have just left you alone after all."  
  
He was so furious; he felt his face must burn red. As red as her dark red hair, he silently cursed Lily Evans. Lily with those eyes, that tongue that cut him much too deep, oh how he hated her. He hated her and he couldn't help but hate himself because he couldn't stop looking at her - couldn't get up and walk away from her and way she smelled like - raspberries.  
  
Catching himself considering what exactly Lily's hair smelled like, he leaned back into his chair. "I really would prefer to end this conversation," he told her. He glared sullenly into the ball, seeing nothing about Lily's blue hair, or his death.  
  
Lily looked at him, confused, then sat down in her own chair. From the next table over, Sirius and Belle were frozen, looking at the two as if a massacre had just occurred. Sirius had somehow procured giant fake silver hoop earrings. They dangled as he stared at Lily, then James, then Lily, then Belle.  
  
"Oh dear," was all Belle could manage. 


	3. Chapter Three

3  
  
Speeding towards the earth at an intense speed, James swerved and pulled up at the last second, leaving the bludger to smash into the ground, momentarily stuck in the mud. He went looking for the ball and got a pass from Horace Gray. The quaffle ready he confronted the problem of getting in past the goal keeper, Arabella Figg.  
  
"C'mon Potter, I'm getting to be an old lady," she called out, egging him on.  
  
"Patience Figg, I'm thinking of a way to defeat you," he called back as he circled the three rings, dodging the now free bludger which was dripping and flinging dirt.  
  
"Whatever you say to make yourself feel better Potter," she replied, but she tensed up. She knew he was going in for the goal. He chose the ring to the left, swerved towards the right and dropping suddenly lower went for an underneath shot.  
  
Arabella swatted it away with her broom when it was dangerously close. "Oh, too bad," she chided. He laughed. Horace and the rest of the team flew up around them, practice appeared to be ending.  
  
"You're doing better Figg. Even Potter can't get past you," Horace told the Keeper.  
  
Why thank you Horace, what a lovely thing to say." She accepted the compliment while picking a chunk of mud out of her black hair. After throwing it off and giving it a look of disgust, she looked at the team and screamed.  
  
"Bludger!"  
  
Calmly, the team, as if moving as one, turned sideways and dropped about six feet on their brooms. After the giant metal ball had rushed past in a blur, they rose to their previous positions without a word.  
  
"Ready for the game on Saturday?" James asked the team.  
  
"Sure," their Seeker, Laura Strom said. "Ravenclaw is good, but ever since their best chaser started failing Herbology and got put on probation, they've been a lot weaker."  
  
"I heard that he didn't fail, I heard his hand got bitten off by one of those man eating plants with the teeth in the greenhouse - you know the big purple ones - " another Chaser said.  
  
"No, my friend Eva is in his class and she said that it grabbed onto his quill, no appendages where lost," said Belle.  
  
"Herbology," pondered Horace, I took that with Professor Fofflepot and she had this things about nature walks."  
  
"Enough!" interrupted James. "If it's not about Quidditch then talk about it later. And besides, I heard he lost his eye and his hand and three toes."  
  
"Bludger!!" screamed Laura.  
  
The team sighed and ducked.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
At the end of dinner on Friday Dumbledore stood and made some announcements. Lily wasn't paying much attention at first, instead she poked around her mashed potatoes with a fork, constructing a volcano and then filling it with peas. He moved on to a lecture on the negative consequences of using your broomstick as a sword in the hall (last week Sean Chaney, a first year, had put out the eye of Ian Randall as they swashbuckled between classes. There was hysteria. Madame Pomfrey was rumored to have had to get him a new eye. There were rumors that surrounded how she had gotten the new eye, which had blended into the hand and giant plant rumors as well.). Lily studied the ceiling and tried to pick out constellations in the stars, then drew connect the dots with her wand. After what seemed like hours of broomstick safety lessons and a speech about the ten best reasons not to wander into the Forbidden Forest she heard something interesting.  
  
"Would Lucius Malfoy come up there for a moment please?" Dumbledore requested. The blond Slytherin stood and walked to the professor's table. Lily could feel his eyes grazing over the Gryffindor section, looking. She felt a wave of panic, but kept her face blank, emotionless.  
  
"Students," Dumbeldore continued, "There has been a theft concerning one of our students. Mr. Malfoy's trunk was broken into and one of his belongings is missing. We are still searching for the reason and purpose for his incident. If any of you," as he paused and made a sweeping glace over the student body, "have any information concerning this event I suggest you step forward. Please see Professor McGonagall with any concerns. I suppose that's it. Dueling club meets at eight o clock tonight, here in the dining room. Goodnight."  
  
As he spoke Lily could feel the eyes of Lucuis Malfoy wandering over each person at her table. She felt them pause on her. Her hands were shaking slightly, quickly she shoved them under the table. Nervous though she was, her expression remained nonchalant. Eva regained her attention.  
  
"Hurry up Lily, we have to go get some good spells for tonight," she called, rising and leaving the table. Lily nodded and followed. She saw James Potter studying her as they left. His eyes seemed very dark. What was James doing in the hallway that night?  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
James heard the news and yawned. He knew Lucuis was staring at him and his friends. Sirius was giving him some twisted version of the evil eye back. James was aware that Lucuis had some inkling of the fact he and his friends were known to wander around at night, as they occasionally got in trouble. Too bad he didn't know the half of it. The Marauders kept many secrets. Still, it was obvious that they were the Slytherin's main suspects.  
  
"I suppose if I were him, I would think it was us too," conceded Remus. "In fact, I think we should be prepared for a little retaliatory action. Lock up your things, hide the map. I don't trust that kid as far as I can throw a stick. Not him or his crony." Malfoy and his friend Snape were in the corner, looking as if they were planning a conspiracy.  
  
Sirius smiled and added, "Yeah, too bad we didn't do it. Ha. Poor kid, barking up the wrong tree. Why would we want his stuff anyways, right James?"  
  
James was too busy looking at Lily, whose face was unreadable, save a few well hidden traces of panic. What had she been doing in the hallway that night anyways? He resolved to find out.  
  
"James? I said that Malfoy - "  
  
"-What?" James was snapped back into the conversation.  
  
Sirius sighed. "I was just saying that Lucius is wrong this time." There was a long pause.  
  
"Yeah - " was all the response they got from James as he got up and jogged out of the dining room, apparently on a mission.  
  
"What's wrong with him?" asked an out of the loop Peter.  
  
"To be honest," said Remus, "I'm not exactly sure."  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
"Remember class, to fairly and truly defeat your opponent, you must abide by the rules that the Ministry of Magic has set for recreational dueling. With that reminder, I begin this session of the Hogwarts Dueling Club. Tonight, instead of technique, we are going to duel one another. I remind you, no pyrotechnics or explosions please, and watch where you wave your wands. Nobody wants another Ian Randall incident," and with that speech complete, Professor Armeis took his place at the center sideline to mediate and referee.  
  
Two equal lines had formed on each side of the dueling strip. Lily happened to be in a spot where her opponent would be James Potter. Potter looked at her from across the strip and laughed. How cocky.  
  
Since they were only halfway in the line, both watched Remus win several duels before stepping down. Defense against spells of any kind came at seemingly no effort to him. It appeared he had spent a lot of time outside school studying techniques. When the line became more and more depleted, Lily found herself near the front. It then became apparent to her there had been a change in the line up. Somehow, when James and Sirius were talking, Snape had joined and gone ahead of them in line, adding one person to that side. So if she recounted, Lily was going to duel - oh no.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
"This is going to be ugly," claimed James, pushing up his sleeves. "Evans is going down. No mercy - "  
  
"Umm James?" interrupted Sirius, "If I can count right, and I sure hope I can - you're not dueling Lily. Snape cut when we weren't looking. You're with Belle, behind her. Lily is dueling," and he pointed ahead "him."  
  
James looked and cringed.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Lily saw Sirius pointing, she saw James look, then at her, and then attempt to figure a way to trade places, but it was too late. Snape won his duel with Eva and that left her to go next.  
  
"Lily Evans and Lucius Malfoy," Professor Armeis called out.  
  
Lily Evans was no coward. She stepped onto the dueling path with a small swagger in her step and a smile on her lips. She was not going to lose. Not to him, of all people. Sadly, her slightly shaking wand betrayed her nerves to those who may have studied closely. They met at the middle and awaited the voice of the Professor, wands ready. He was inches away, like before, only this time he could see her. His eyes were like thick ice, a cold cold blue. Almost like inside it was always winter.  
  
"Hello Evans," he said.  
  
"Hello Malfoy."  
  
"Tell me Evans, what exactly are your plans for Christmas this year?" He smiled at her in return.  
  
"How sweet Lucuis, I didn't know you cared," she replied, as her own smile disappeared.  
  
"Well you, know, I was just thinking," he motioned her a bit closer with his free hand. "That maybe when you went home, you know, to your muggle home, and saw your, well, muggle parents, that it may be in your best interest to," he paused and laughed, "stay there." His laugh got louder. "Permanently." He looked at Snape on the sidelines who was smiling uneasily. Lily said nothing. Her features darkened. All she could hear was the voice of the Professor beginning to count. She turned and began her steps.  
  
Lucuis did as well, still chuckling to himself. On the sidelines, James watched, wondering what Lily and Malfoy would have to talk about, why he was laughing. He looked across the way at Belle, who caught his glance and shrugged helplessly, shaking her head. The tension in the air was stifling. Lily's knuckles were white from the grip on her wand. The Professor counted his last step. The two turned.  
  
What followed was perhaps one of the shortest duels in the Hogwarts Dueling Club History. Malfoy immediately sent a spell towards Lily, a name she remembered hearing in class. Quickly she countered it, and the green light sent flashing her way soon dissipated into the air. Before Malfoy could register that his attempt had been thwarted, Lily muttered a spell under her breath (Relarhemis) and sent a shock of blue towards her opponent. Being unprepared, Malfoy's dodge was ill timed and unsuccessful. Several seconds later found him on the ground, unable to move. His legs and arms were pinned to his body, which was tense as a board.  
  
Professor Aremis turned him over and gasped. His mouth seemed to be sutured shut. Malfoy tried to yell but all that came out was mumbles. He realized his predicament and started making a racket. The Professor stepped back for a moment to start the counter curse, and the entire club saw what had befallen Malfoy. Armeis turned to Lily.  
  
"He'll be fine in a minute or so. The Relarhemis spell, perhaps useful for actual duels but really, Miss Evans, not in our recreational setting. You're lucky I'm familiar with the spell and know how to undo it. Impressive, Evans, however, bad choice. Ten points from Gryffindor."  
  
"I apologize Professor Aremis." She walked over to Malfoy, where he now lay at her feet. His eyes, still blue, now burned. She could imagine how he must be cursing her in his head. "And I'm sorry Lucuis," she added, but in a much colder tone. She crouched, leaned down to his face, and whispered in his ear. "It may be in your best interest, Malfoy, never to underestimate me again." She pulled back and took one more look at his furious expression, and smiled. With that she walked back towards her friends, and they continued out and towards the Gryffindor tower.  
  
The Professor was trying to regain the class's attention, get a volunteer to move Lucius until he recovered, and resume the duels. But no one was listening; all eyes were on the red haired girl who strolled out of the room, as uncaring as if she had squashed a fly. 


	4. Chapter Four

4  
  
Sitting in their bedroom, Ava, Belle, and Lily were alone. The three sat in a circle, eating mashmallows and playing a game of cards. Being Friday night, most of the people were in the common room below making a ruckus. Instead of joining them as usual, the girls thought a quiet evening may be best for Lily after the Dueling Club fiasco. Here no one could get to them and ask questions. There were two other seventh year girls, one was a quiet shy girl who preferred the company of some of the sixth years. The other moved when her parents divorced last year and transferred to a Wizarding school somewhere in France. So that left the three, playing poker and gambling with Chocolate Frogs. Eva dealt.  
  
"Lily," she asked, "Where did you get that spell you used on Malfoy?"  
  
Lily glanced at her cards and arranged them in her hand. "I read it in a book in the library," she said. "When we were all looking. I was looking for spells to use on Potter, and I found that one. I thought it was too mean, so I wasn't planning on using it. I'm glad I learned it anyways."  
  
"Ha!" Belle said. "Usually I would say go for it, but we do need him for tomorrow's game." She shuffled her own cards. She added, "And what the heck was Malfoy laughing at?"  
  
"The usual Belle," sighed Lily. "Muggle this, muggle that, Mudblood this, he wants me gone from the school that - it's alright though really, I'm used to him by now."  
  
"Are you going to be ok with this Lily? I mean you looked pretty upset in there, and now, you act like everything is fine," Belle asked.  
  
"I'm sorry Lily," said Eva. "I really am. He deserves whatever's coming to him."  
  
Lily grinned. "I'll really ok, and I think so too Eva - and - I'll raise you two frogs."  
  
"You know what's really funny Lily?" asked Belle, hoping for a lighter subject.  
  
"What?"  
  
"That Trelawny stuck you and Potter together in Divination. You two must share the same energy."  
  
"Shut up Belle," Lily threw a pillow her way. "I hope tomorrow he falls off his broom."  
  
"Oh stop it Lily. You two might get along if you weren't both so stubborn," added Eva.  
  
"He's stubborn all right. And conceited, and, well, a bit slutty, not to mention self centered -"  
  
"-and cute," said Eva. The two looked at her with wide eyes. "Oh no," she said defensively. "He's not my type, no no, but I recognize that the boy is good looking."  
  
"You're insane. Both of you," declared Lily.  
  
"Besides," commented Belle "He never actually dates those girls, they just surround him. As soon as he gets to know them they fail to hold his interest and he sends them packing."  
  
"I could care less about the dating practices of James Potter. I don't care if he dates every girl in the school, or wins every Quidditch match, or gets elected the flippin Minister of Magic. I, Lily Evans, will never, ever be interested." She laid down her cards. "Full House."  
  
Eva groaned. "Aww Lily." She pushed the frogs over to the winner, and with a desolated look ate a marshmallow.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Before they went to bed, Belle asked Lily again. "Are you sure you're ok Lily? If I were you, I would be pretty hurt by the kind of things that happen tonight."  
  
"Trust me Belle, I am fine. Go to sleep, you have a game tomorrow morning."  
  
"Ok, goodnight Lily."  
  
Eva was already asleep. The fourth girl, Marilyn, had climbed into bed and fallen asleep long ago. Lily waited till the sound of Belle's breathing was slower and heavier. Then she waited a bit longer to be sure. Glancing at the clock, Lily decided that at 3:30, everyone would be asleep. She crept down to the common room. Like she had expected, no one was there.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
James was awake in bed again. Remus was back, he and Sirius were sleeping silently. And Peter, Peter was snoring quite loudly. Occasionally he mumbled things in his sleep which never made sense. James turned on his side and looked at the door, his arms crossed. What would Lucius Malfoy have that someone would go through so much trouble to steal? And had Lily stolen it?  
  
He hadn't done it. Lucius may still think he and his friends were responsible, but after Lily's performance tonight, he may begin to suspect her too. Good, James thought. I hope he catches her and turns her hair permanently blue. James stopped. He knew what Malfoy would do is much worse than that. Much worse. Still, the curiosity drove him. What is it that Lily Evans wanted so badly she stole it from the trunk of a Slytherin? How did she get in there and do it?  
  
Tonight had been frightening. At first he was somewhat worried for his house member matched against Malfoy. Malfoy by himself was quite weak and laughable, however, there had been some strange occurrences lately in the world of magic, the rumored rise of a dark wizard. He couldn't help think that the quick improvement of Malfoy's magical capabilities were an indicator he was involved. Plus, his family was notorious for it's allegiance to the Slytherin line. And then there was Lily Evans, who he had grossly misjudged.  
  
He had never seen anything like it. The girl rose her wand and deflected his spell as if she were merely raising her arm. So calm, so angry. Then she whispered something to herself and before he knew it Malfoy was flattened, incapacitated.  
  
She breaks into the Slytherin common room, bedroom, escapes, and then completely destroys Malfoy in a duel. Maybe there was something strange about her as well.her behavior was awfully suspicious.  
  
With that he grabbed his invisibility cloak from his trunk and stepped towards the door, hoping to go down to the potions dungeon, maybe Lily was down there for a reason, maybe she had lost something down there, or hid whatever it was that she took from Malfoy. He put on the cloak and went out the door, closing it silently.  
  
Down the stairs and into the common room, James was almost to the portrait hole when he spotted someone in a chair by the fireplace. He heard the turn of a page. Curious, he walked towards the chair and looked around.  
  
Evans. She was reading a book. But, he noticed, there were no words on the pages. A black book. Blank pages. She was staring at it, searching though it, looking at each page over and over. In fact, she looked quite desperate. The hand that held the volume shook slightly. She brushed her hair behind her ear and he again saw the deep cut on her arm, it seemed to be healing slowly. Maybe she needed stitches, he thought. It didn't seem to bother her, all her attention seemed to be on that book.  
  
James sat and watched her turn the pages. Why he wasn't sure. He saw her whisper spells to the book and the pages stayed blank. She closed it finally, leaned back in her chair, shut her eyes. James didn't go out into the hall, if Lily heard the portrait door open she's know someone was there. He walked back up the stairs and laid down.  
  
Lily Evans was trouble, he had decided.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
The morning of the Quidditch match, the Hogwarts students gathered in the bleachers wore warm sweaters, coats, and most importantly scarves that bore the colors of their house. Eva and Lily were wearing their burgundy and gold ones as they watched Belle continually block attempts at the goal. She was quite good, but had received a nasty blow on the arm from a stray ball. She only had to last a little longer, Laura, the Gryffidor seeker and a sixth year looked to be chasing around the snitch. Gyriffindor was ahead by quite a bit, almost 100 points. Still, the snitch was worth more than that. James scored another goal just before Laura's outstretched had grabbed the snitch and ended the game. There was cheering and celebrating in the Gyriffindor section, Eva and Lily went to wait for Belle outside the locker room to see about her arm. She emerged with a nasty purple and blue splotch covering her upper left arm.  
  
"Oh gross Arabella," exclaimed Eva.  
  
"Oh it looks worse than it is," said Belle. "I just have to go to Madame Pomfrey and have her make sure nothing was cracked or moved -"  
  
"Stop, please," Ava begged.  
  
"Sorry, but come with me and keep me company please?" she pleaded.  
  
"Ok Belle, we'll go. Even Eva," said Lily grabbing the arm of the girl looking at Belle with a queasy expression.  
  
"Yeah we can see that kid in the infirmary, you know the one who lost a eye and hand and his right kneecap," Belle suggested.  
  
"That's all a rumor you know," Lily said. "What really happened is he lost eye and then all of his toes - "  
  
"Oh disgusting, please stop," cried Eva.  
  
"I thought it was only the toes on his left foot," pondered Belle.  
  
"According to popular belief the plant got a hold of both feet and a hand while he was broomstick fighting with Sean - "  
  
"Ugh," moaned Eva as she turned green. They had all begun to walk when the locker room door opened and Potter came out, his Quidditch robes and his person covered in dirt. His usually messy hair was even messier.  
  
"Figg, we need you back in here for a minute while we work out a new play. It'll be quick, only take a few minutes," he said.  
  
"We are taking her to the infirmary," said Lily, leading Belle towards the castle.  
  
"Was I speaking to you Evans?" James asked.  
  
"Her arm is hurt, Potter, don't you care?" asked Lily.  
  
"It's okay Lily, I should be fine for a few min -" tried Belle.  
  
"See? She said she's fine Evans."  
  
"Her arm could be in worse shape if she waits around for you and your play," she retorted.  
  
"Ummm - guys - " Belle was looking back and forth.  
  
"Why are you even here?" James bellowed.  
  
"She's my friend you jerk, it's obvious I care more about her well being than -"  
  
"Don't pull that crap on me Evans, Belle would tell me if she needed to go to the infirmary now, wouldn't you Belle?"  
  
"Like you would listen anyways - " Lily shouted back.  
  
"Ok, that's it Evans," James yelled. He took off his robes and threw them on the ground. He was wearing a pair of jeans and long sleeved shirt underneath. He was wearing a tee shirt under that. He took off the long sleeved shirt and ripped part of it, tying the ends together. He walked over to Belle, wrapped part of it around her shoulder and waist, and put her injured arm into it. He had made a pretty good sling for Belle's arm and then did a spell to tighten it somewhat close to her body.  
  
"There. She is coming in for five minutes. I am sure she won't die in that time frame, and if she does, I take full responsibility. You," he looked at Lily, "and Eva can wait out here."  
  
Lily noticed a smudge of dirt on his cheek. She had a sudden compulsion to reach up and wipe it off. She stopped herself and thought that it indeed confirmed her insanity. He led Belle inside and closed the door rather harshly. The two girls looked at the door in silence for a moment.  
  
"I think he's mad at you Lily."  
  
"Quiet Eva." 


	5. Chapter Five

5  
  
"Your move," Sirius said to Lily. Lily stared at the chessboard and considered her options. Belle sat nearby with Remus and Eva playing Exploding Snap. Remus was losing horribly. Being as good natured as he was, he laughed and put out a small fire that started on his sock. Belle was fine, Madame Pomfrey had found small damage to the bone, a tiny fracture, but had mended it with some spells. Belle had been given a more formal sling till tomorrow.  
  
"You always beat me Sirius. I don't know why I even try anymore," Lily said.  
  
"Oh, maybe someday," he replied. "Plus you know it makes me feel good when I continually beat you."  
  
Lily laughed. "Yes, I'm sure it does." She moved her knight and took a bishop of his. James walked in through the entrance, wearing normal clothes, as was the custom on the weekends. But he was clothed in old jeans and a grey tee shirt that looked like it had seen much better days.  
  
"Detention again James?" Sirius called out.  
  
"Yep," said James.  
  
"Trophy room or Greenhouse?" he asked, without turning around in his chair to have a good look.  
  
"Greenhouse."  
  
"Oh, too bad there."  
  
"Thanks Sirius."  
  
"Come over here for a moment James, I need a favor." James stopped, switched directions, and came over to the gathering in front of the fireplace. "I need to go find Professor McGonagall and ask her about my grade, but you see, I'm doing quite well at this chess game and I don't want to lose my place. I trust you James, take over, just for ten minutes."  
  
"No."  
  
"Ten minutes." James looked at Lily.  
  
"No."  
  
"It's ok James," Lily said. "I know how bad it would make you feel to lose to me." She started to get up. "You can go ahead Sirius, we can finish later -"  
  
"I wouldn't lose," said James, crossing his arms.  
  
Lily gave him a condescending smile. "No, no, of course not. Forget I even said it."  
  
"No, really."  
  
"Don't worry about it James."  
  
"Ok fine, I'll play."  
  
"Are you sure?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Yes. C'mon Evans. Let's play."  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
It was about ten minutes into a new game they had started, and Sirius had disappeared completely. James had said if he was going to beat her, he was going to beat her fairly, not with Sirius's strategy already in place. Now, he was watching her think. Lily was wearing a green turtleneck sweater, one that made her eyes seem unreal. The fire was turning her dark hair all different shades of red, she rested her chin on her fist as she stared at the board. James was startled by a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Hi James!" Alice squeaked as she hugged him around the neck. James was a bit uncomfortable with this new display of affection she was showing him - she was cutting off his air.  
  
"Hi Alice," he choked out.  
  
"Oh hi Lily," Alice added. She flipped her blond hair and turned her attention back to James. "What're you doin?" she asked.  
  
James stopped for a moment; he thought the answer to this question was obvious.  
  
"Playing chess," he said. Lily had maneuvered a pawn, it was his move. He turned his attention to the board.  
  
"That's neat," said Alice. "I like chess. Hey, you know, next weekend is a Hogesmede weekend," she continued.  
  
"Oh, it is?" James was surprised. He had forgotten that was coming up. "Yeah I was thinking maybe we could go into town together," she suggested. James looked over the boards and moved his bishop out. He looked at Lily. She looked up at him. Then Alice. She suppressed a laugh and shook her head.  
  
What right did she have to do that? She wasn't his relationship conscience. For all he knew, she could be in league with Malfoy. What would it hurt to have Alice come along with them all to Hogesmede?  
  
"Yeah, sure Alice. Sirius, Remus and I are all going, if you want to come too," he said, never taking his eyes off Lily.  
  
She glanced up at him and then moved her rook. She was looking at his face, something on his face. She scooted up in her chair, leaned over the board.  
  
"So James," Alice continued, "Are you winning or losing?"  
  
He never moved his eyes. "Oh, there's no way to really tell. But if I had to take a guess, I would say winning," James replied.  
  
He too scooted to the end of his chair, leaned forward. He studied the board for about five minutes. He moved a piece. His eyes went back to Lily. They were sitting quite close. Her lips parted as she took a deep breath in.  
  
"I would never lose to you, Potter," she said softly, so only he could hear. She looked up. Her eyes were vivid. "Never." She glanced back down to the board, he took an even deeper breath.  
  
"Peter was teaching me how earlier this year," Alice went on with a giggle. "But I'm not very good, maybe you could help me."  
  
Lily's hand moved over the board. Paused. She looked again at James's face. Her hand changed directions, landed on her queen. She moved this piece outward, boldly. How confident.  
  
"Sure," James said. He almost had her. In three moves he would have her and then he would win. He could almost taste the victory, and it was sweet. Like, raspberries.  
  
The smell of raspberries was invading his senses, her hair, it must be her hair or her perfume. He watched her hand move slowly from her side, out, towards his face. She touched the side of his cheek, slid her thumb along it. Some dirt fell from his cheek and crumbled on the board.  
  
"You had something on your face, Potter," she said.  
  
"Oh," he said, suddenly embarrassed.  
  
"Don't worry James, it's cute," chimed in Alice. James looked down at the board. His vision was extremely sharp but his thought process had some kind of haze over it. Where was his plan again? Ah, yes, three more moves, and he would have her in check. The game was almost won. He moved.  
  
Lily was studying the board. Rested her head on a hand half covered in the forest green sweater. She pulled it around her hand then let is go, wrapped it around her fingers and then unwrapped it, over and over as she thought. She put her hand on a piece. Looked at him. Moved it.  
  
Two more, James thought. This one and the next. Just remember the plan.  
  
"You know what my favorite chess piece is?" asked Alice. "The horse one. It's pretty, at least prettier than the other pieces. What is that one called James?"  
  
James looked at the board. He knew his next move. Then up at Lily. Their eyes were locked. Deep, green. He thought of all the things she had said to him in Divination. He was angry, upset. She would lose now. Her lips parted again as she took in a breath, and she smelled unendingly of raspberries.  
  
"A knight, Alice," he told her, and moved his queen. Her next move was unimportant. He could sense his success, couldn't wait for it. She held his eyes for one more moment, the anticipation was building. Her hand moved to the board. His eyes never left her.  
  
"Checkmate," she said. James didn't believe it. He studied the board. He saw what she had done, her plan had been in place but he had been blind to it, not seen it, not blocked it. He stuttered out the beginnings of some words, but couldn't think of anything to say. Lily leaned in even closer to him, close enough to whisper in his ear.  
  
"Never," was the only word she uttered before getting up and walking away. As she reached the stairs, she called back "I hope you two have fun in Hogesmede. Goodnight Alice; James."  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Lily trudged up the stairs, reached her room, and closed the door behind her. Wiped a sheen of sweat off her forehead, opened a window. Damn that James Potter. He was making a date right in front of her and still she couldn't help but wipe that stupid dirt off his cheek. She threw herself down on a chair by the window and looked out at the fall landscape. The leaves were dropping everywhere, the sun colored the sky. She missed home, but she knew what she was about to do was long overdue. There was a collection of letters from her mother in her drawer. She got her owl, Persephone, out of her cage as she was visiting for food and wrote a letter to home. It explained how she wasn't coming home for Christmas this year, she was staying at Hogwarts. It also included an obligatory lie, citing studies and responsibilities as her main reasons for doing so.  
  
Everything had gone smoothly so far, except the fact she ran into Potter. She hoped he wouldn't be anymore of a problem than he had already become, what with his questions, his attitude. He got right under her skin, made her so angry. She smiled remembering the look on James's face when he realized she had beaten him.  
  
Lily could see him now, she bet he was still down there, studying the board, wondering how she got past him. Perhaps making dates with several other girls as he did so. She doubted Alice was the only one. She fell back on her bed and closed her eyes, reliving her moment once more. "Checkmate," she said to the empty room.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
James was examining the chessboard, trying to trace back her movements as far as he could remember. When did she move past him? After Lily had left, he had turned to see again Belle and Sirius staring at him and the space Lily had occupied. Again they looked shocked.  
  
"Well Sirius," said Belle, turning to the dark haired boy, "Was it as good for you as it was for me?"  
  
"Yes, Arabella, I'm impressed."  
  
Both of them fanned themselves with their hands. Remus put out another sock fire. Eva was shuffling and Peter, as usual, was nowhere to be found. James ignored them. Alice had sat down in the place where Lily once was, and began to move the pieces as if to start a new game.  
  
"No! Stop!" James scolded her.  
  
She looked confused.  
  
"Just give me a minute," he explained, and began again to look over the board. Alice sighed and waited. Fifteen minutes later she was dozing in the chair, and James had it figured out. It was so simple, why didn't he see it? Because he had been watching her twist that sweater around her hand; he had been watching her eyes and her face. He touched the place on his check where her hand had grazed him.  
  
She could be evil. She could be working with Lucius, no, even worse, be competing with Lucius. There was no telling why she had that black book. James was pretty sure that was the thing she had taken from him. If it belonged to her, she would know how to work it, what it did. He wanted answers.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
"There are three areas of predictions and prophecies we are going to cover. Crystal Ball Divination, Astrological Charting, and Palm Reading," lectured Madame Trelawny.  
  
Eva was trying to turn her quill back to normal. Remus had accidentally ruined it in Charms. He had been trying to set it so the ink would refill itself when it ran out. Not only did that fail, but the ink was now turning invisible a few minutes after she wrote with it. Sirius was trying to fix it now, saying spells quietly as Madame Trelawny pointed at a chart of planetary movements. Lily watched him point his wand at it and whisper something. The ink exploded out, spurting up and covering his face. Belle burst out laughing, luckily it disappeared right before Madame Trelawny looked over. Neither of them mentioned Lily was excellent in Charms, they opted to watch Sirius struggle.  
  
"Today," she continued, "we are going to begin palm reading. Basic palm reading. As we continue, your methods will become more advanced. Consult the chart on page 126 of your text for a guide to the lines of the hands. Practice on your partner." Lily glanced at James. He was chatting with Angela the Hufflepuff. She would love nothing more than to lay her head down and take a nap, however, Madame Trelawny was pacing the room.  
  
"Give me your hand," she told James. The Hufflepuff looked angry at having been interrupted.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Your hand? The palm reading. Here comes the Professor," Lily said.  
  
"Oh, yeah. Here." He offered her his hand, palm up. She dragged it across the table and examined it closely. Lily felt strangely; hands were somewhat personal, she felt she was invading his privacy. Consulting the text, Lily found several different lines.  
  
"This one, this one is your health. It doesn't fork or anything. The book said that's good. It looks like your all set there," she explained as Trelawny passed by. The Professor frowned, Lily changed her story.  
  
"Oh wait, I see one there, yep. It looks like you may get a tumor sometime in the near future," she lied. Trelawny, seemingly appeased, continued walking. James actually laughed a little.  
  
"Ok, and, here is your life line. Well, I think that's your lifeline. But it's pretty short Potter. Maybe that's something else - no, that's your lifeline. Madame Trelawny will be delighted," she continued.  
  
"Great," said James. "You and her can throw a party and celebrate."  
  
"Oh I wish Potter. Only if you buy into this stuff."  
  
"What else does it say?"  
  
"Let's see, your love line." Lily kept her comments to herself. "Hmmm - looks here like you have one crossroad. You will have one love, one marriage. Strange, doesn't seem to fit the Potter image."  
  
"Be quiet and give me your hand," James ordered. Lily obliged.  
  
"I'm going to be married six times," announced Sirius gleefully from the next table.  
  
"I think so, wait, that may not be your loveline - " warned Belle.  
  
"Tumors?" suggested Lily.  
  
"Perhaps," answered Belle.  
  
Sirius frowned. "Don't crush my dream you two," he complained.  
  
Lily looked back at James who was studying her palm intently. "Well well Evans," he laughed, "I'm not the only one who goes early. Your lifeline is pretty short as well."  
  
"Maybe we just end up killing each other," Lily wondered.  
  
"That's not possible Evans."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"You'd never even get the chance," he replied. "If one of us goes, it's not going to be me."  
  
"What makes you so sure?" Lily asked. James didn't answer. He was too busy watching Sirius struggle with the quill again. He was squirted once more. Instead of reminding him she had another quill, Eva just laughed.  
  
"I hate his enchanted ink!" he muttered, throwing the pen on the desk.  
  
Lily and James both laughed. Sirius and the enchanted ink. Suddenly Lily froze. The enchanted ink. She stood suddenly, Eva looked at her. "Lily, what are you doing?"  
  
"It's the ink, the ink is enchanted. Not the book. It's not the book." Lily spoke to herself as she moved across the room. She ran out the classroom door and into the corridor. Behind her, a shocked Madame Trelawny looked at the door, then back at Lily's friends.  
  
"Tumor," Sirius said sadly, shaking his head.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
Lily ran down the hallways, racing for the library. It was the ink. She had been concentrating her charms and spells on the book itself, as if the whole thing were enchanted. But it was only the ink.  
  
This still did not solve her dilemma, the book would not be so easy to unlock; using some amateur spell she learned in class. The process would require some research and long hours in the library. As she entered, she smiled at the librarian, an old grizzly lady named Margie Stow. Margie grunted in return, picking back up her copy of a muggle romance novel.  
  
Lily started to orient herself, thinking of sections the information would be in. For a moment she thought, then paused. What if it wasn't written in ink? What if it was something else? There's another reason my spells could be failing, she told herself.  
  
As Lily thumbed through pages of a volume on various ancient writing methods, she realized that she would be better off actually holding the item in question. Gathering her things, Lily hurried out of the library and to her dormitory.  
  
Throwing open the door and heading for her trunk , she tossed the lid open and started pawing through her belongings. She looked in the place she had last put the book, she always put it there, wrapped in an old sweater her grandmother had knitted. It was gone. The sweater was unfolded.  
  
"Looking for something?" came a voice from behind her.  
  
Lily stood frozen, and then spun around. He was standing next to the door. He was holding the book. 


	6. Chapter Six

6  
  
"What are you doing here?" Lily raged.  
  
"No, no, I think the question may be, perhaps, what are you doing here.see Lily you're supposed to be in class.everyone else is in class. You're skipping aren't you? Oh no! I expected better from - "  
  
"That doesn't belong to you Potter," she hissed.  
  
"Well Evans, technically it doesn't belong to you either - "  
  
"That's besides the point. How could you go through my things??" She looked at James with a mixture of hate, disgust, and horror.  
  
"Lily," he said calmly, moving closer to her, "You see, this all has to do with logic. Let me reexamine the information quickly for you.a summary. I catch you out late at night in the hall, on the same night Malfoy's trunk is vandalized. You're being chased by none other than: Lucius Malfoy. Obviously I can assume you stole whatever it is he wants back. It also happens that I, on my way out observed you looking at a book in quite a secret agent fashion, no one around. You spoke spells to it, you went over it repeatedly. I figure you must be desperate to know - "  
  
"James," interrupted Lily, her patience running out, "what are you getting to?"  
  
"But that's the question Lily, what are you doing with this book? You risked expulsion and some serious physical harm to get it - I see things can be either one of two ways."  
  
James walked even closer, looking her directly in the eye. "You wanted this book for information or a way to hurt Malfoy. Either that's because you know he's evil and want to get rid of him, or - "  
  
"Or - " Lily was stone. Again her expression became unreadable, like a cloud had passed over her face. "or because I want to get rid of him, take his place. Get my foot in the door, maybe?" She hesitated. "Is that what you think James?"  
  
James didn't say anything, he just looked at her face, waiting, waiting for some emotion to betray her. He needed to know what he was dealing with.  
  
"Get out." It was a quiet order. Lily stared up at him, her eyes flickering with something.what is was James didn't know.  
  
"No, Lily, you owe me an explanati- "  
  
"Get - Out," was all she could mutter. This time it was louder. She tried to grab the book from his hand; he pulled it out of her reach.  
  
"Lily, I'm serious here, you'll leave me no choice - "  
  
"Get Out." The last time was quite loud, Lily was not playing around. Previously in disbelief, James began to realize she wasn't going to tell him anything. The situation had brought him beyond frustration.  
  
"Fine Evans, fine, whatever you say - " he muttered, storming out, slamming the door behind him.  
  
The second she heard the crash of the door, Lily Evans collapsed onto the bed, face held in her shaking hands, unable to hold in the flood any longer. Gasping for breath she wiped the tears away with the back of her hand. It was useless, her entire face was drenched. Slowly, she drew her legs up onto the bed, and clutching her arms close to her chest, curled into a ball around them  
  
He had gone through her things. What else had he found?  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
James wasn't touching his dinner. As Remus, Sirius and Peter ate and remained oblivious, James glanced down the table at the pair of Eva and Belle, talking cheerfully. No Lily. Dinner was almost over and she still wasn't coming. Not able to take the suspense, James got up and went to sit by the two girls.  
  
"Hi Arabella, Eva," he greeted the two. He noticed Alice Rowley and the Hufflepuff named Angela eyeing him from different points of the room. Great, the thought, massaging a temple and preparing for the ensuing migraine.  
  
"Hey James," said Eva. Belle nodded and gave a small wave, she was busy chewing.  
  
"Just you two tonight?" he added, as if this were his first time observing it.  
  
"Yep," said Belle. Eva was not so easily fooled. She watched him carefully.  
  
"Yes, Lily said she wasn't hungry," she explained.  
  
"Oh," he responded. "That's too bad..." Belle and Eva were both looking at him strangely now.  
  
"Yeah - were you hoping she had left school perhaps? Joined the circus? Navy?" asked Belle, not expecting his previous response. Potter caught their suspicion, and diverted it.  
  
"Oh of course not Belle. The circus would never take Lily," he grinned. "Well, I'll leave you ladies to your dinner, I have some homework to do - " claimed James, rising and leaving. Alice and Angela both chose to get up at the same time. He began to walk faster, and as soon as he hit the dining room doors, he sprinted towards the tower.  
  
* * * * * * *  
  
There was knocking on her bedroom door. Lily had cleaned up well before her roommates had retuned, telling them she wasn't feeling well enough to go to class or dinner. They had believed her, and now she had some more time to herself.  
  
If it were Eva and Belle at the door, they would just come in, they wouldn't knock.  
  
"Who is it?" she called.  
  
Behind the door, James winced. He thought if he could get in easily, Lily would have to listen to him. Now he wasn't sure he could even get past the door.  
  
"It's James," he answered truthfully.  
  
"Oh James? Well then Potter, since when do you knock? In fact, why don't you just come in and rummage through my belongings, why ask?"  
  
"Ok, Lily, I get your point. Now, can I come in?"  
  
"Ha! Are you serious?" she laughed from her side of the door.  
  
"It's about the book," said James.  
  
Suddenly the door was flung open in his face. "Take the book, you jerk, and shove it-"  
  
"Ok, ok, I know. Evans, just let me in."  
  
Against her better judgment, she held open the door a bit. After James entered, she sat on her bed, looking at him expectantly. He paced the floor.  
  
"I've thought about this," he said, "And I decided, whatever it is you're doing, I'm involved." He looked at her.  
  
"How about you f-"  
  
"See Lily, if you're going to destroy people, or Lucius, or something horrible, I need to be there to stop it. I'm going to be watching you. If I see anything suspicious, I'm going to take you down. I have no concrete reasons to report you now, but I might. On the other hand, if you're fighting against Malfoy, I'm not leaving you to do it alone. I think you could handle him alone, but I don't think you know exactly how powerful his friends are, and what they'll do to you." His pace stopped near the bed, where he crouched and looked at her. "I need you to tell me what's going on, Evans."  
  
Lily smirked. "What makes you think I'm going to tell you anything? I don't trust you Potter."  
  
"It seems you have no choice. I have the book. I know this is important to you, otherwise you wouldn't have broken into Lucius Malfoy's trunk. You need it, you need it to continue. You go by my conditions, or you don't go at all," he finished.  
  
Lily was playing with the sleeve of her robe, twisting the slack around the end of her hand, her fingers, repeating. James knew she was thinking. The sleeve stopped.  
  
"You can go where I go, you can assist me. But I don't tell you anything I don't find necessary. In fact, no questions Potter, I won't answer them. This is the worst idea you've ever had, and I just wanted to make it clear that I, for the most part, despise you."  
  
Standing and giving her a small smile, James responded with "Likewise Evans." He turned to leave, and just before he disappeared out the door Lily added: "If you even touch my things again, and I mean ever - "  
  
Without turning around James laughed and said, "Deal." After giving her a small wave, he left. Passing him on the way in were Eva and Belle. They looked down the hall at James and then over at Lily, with raised eyebrows.  
  
"Ummm Lily - is there any reason why James Potter was visiting you - in our bedroom - while you're wearing a, um, bathrobe?" asked Belle.  
  
Lily looked down, she had forgot about wearing her bathrobe when she was angry with James. But Lily was quick - "He brought me our Divination assignment, he had to finish reading my hand before he could write a scroll about it," she answered.  
  
Eva and Belle accepted this, but reluctantly.  
  
"Reading your hand, you say?" Eva used a raunchy tone. Lily threw a pillow.  
  
"You're both hopeless," she announced. 


	7. Chapter Seven

8  
  
Lily brushed a piece of hair out from her eyes and tucked it neatly behind her ear. A couple seconds later it slipped out again; she ignored it and continued to take notes. Glancing nonchalantly to her right, she observed Belle stooped over on the desk, sleeping on her arm. Seeing professor McGonagall strolling down the isle towards their seat, she gave Belle a sharp elbow. Luckily, McGonagall was quickly distracted at that moment by Sirius, who had at that moment fallen out of his own chair after dozing off. He quickly took his seat again and gave a sleepy smile to the professor.  
  
"Ten points Black, I expect you to stay awake in my class," she reprimanded.  
  
"Yes, of course Professor," he replied, changing his expression to one of sappy sweet innocence. Scoffing at his unconvincing attempt, Belle extracted a paper clip from her cheek that had become stuck and imprinted there as she slept on the desk.  
  
Lily ignored the two, drawing a table in her notes to better organize the information. Ten minutes later and satisfied with her efforts, Lily looked over at the clock, anticipating getting to her last class of the day. She could see James out of the corner of her eye, and he was looking somewhat undone. Dark circles enclosed the lower half of his eyes; his cheekbones looked startlingly defined, as is he hadn't eaten in awhile. Without warning, he turned his head and looked straight at her, with an angry questioning appearance. Lily held his gaze for a moment in defiance; she could look wherever she pleased, thank you very much. She wished she didn't have to be his partner next hour in Divination. Hopefully Madame Trelawny would tire of this partner business let them carry on alone again.  
  
James was looking back down at his notes, absentmindedly scribbling it seemed. Belle snored a bit, Lily didn't even bother nudging her. Finally, McGonagall dismissed the class.  
  
*  
  
James stared into the crystal ball, seeing nothing but a smoky haze. Even though it seemed hopeless, anything seemed better than looking across the table at Lily, who was chatting with Remus instead of predicting her future. Instead, all he had to view was her hand resting on the table next to the ball. She was wearing no nail polish, and there were ink marks from her quill all along the side of her hand.  
  
His eyes followed the black marks up to her wrist, and then dropped back to the ball. He had no wish to see Lily today.  
  
"James, hey, what time are we leaving for Hogesmede tomorrow?" broke in Remus.  
  
"What?" asked James, suddenly uncomfortable under his friend's concerned stare.  
  
"Hogesmede, you know, the town? We walk there sometimes - if you can recall all the way back to last month - " he added wistfully, and as sarcastic as was often his nature. Lily smiled, and he grinned back at her.  
  
"Oh, yeah - Whenever, ask Sirius. Peter said he's not going, he's failing Potions and needs tutoring," James added.  
  
Lily turned to Remus and casually said, "Oh, and you must also consult Alice, she will be joining your party as well." Remus looked at her in horror.  
  
"Excuse me? Well then, James, if you are going to bring Ms. Alice you are all on your own. We would rather take Lily instead of you anyways," he added, scooting closer to Lily and Belle. They both grinned and took one of his arms each in their own. James made a noise of disgust.  
  
"Sorry Remus, but you can put up with her for a day, can't you?" James asked impatiently. He felt a familiar wave of anger flicker somewhere in him; Lily was making her usually implication he was some kind of slut. And he was disappointed he and Lily would have to wait till Sunday to meet about Lucius, and for her to tell him some of the story. He couldn't seem to choose between his eagerness to get involved in that situation and his desire to stay away from Lily altogether.  
  
"I know, I know James, she's welcome. But if you are bringing a girl, then the rest of us will bring an escort as well. Lily?" he asked, glancing to his right. Before she could respond, Sirius came and laid across all three, his head ending in Belle's lap.  
  
"Are you in?" he asked her.  
  
"Oh, always, Black," Belle answered. "Are you ready to have your fortune read?" she added, putting back on her bandana and big hoop earrings.  
  
"Tell me everything, even the bad stuff, Madame Figg," Sirius said, putting back in his own hoop earrings and a newly acquired eye patch. Remus, Lily, and James studied them in amazement.  
  
"They're so bloody strange," murmured James finally.  
  
"Yeah, I thought eye patches were for pirates," responded Lily. After a moment she turned to Remus. "You're on, you boys can pick us up at noon," she said.  
  
"Is Eva coming?" checked Belle from across the room.  
  
"No, she has Herbology club," said Lily.  
  
"Ok, then noon it is," said Remus, returning to his partner across the room. Trelawny was a bit distracted today, she was wrapped up in a vision of death a Hufflepuff boy named Brent had seen concerning the entire Ravenclaw Quidditch team.  
  
*  
  
Lily turned back to James and the ball. He said nothing to her, and did not look in her direction. A calm silence enveloped them as Lily touched the ball, holding it in two hands. Lily leaned in towards the smoky orb, moving her hands across it.  
  
"Potter," she whispered.  
  
"What?" he said, never moving his gaze.  
  
"I think I see your future," she said, moving her eyes to his downcast ones.  
  
James laughed a bitter short moment. "Oh really, Evans? What do you see - and don't disappoint me with the usual - you're losing your touch you know," he told her.  
  
Lily slid her hand across the table, and covered his large hand resting there with her own. She had meant to get his attention, to get him to look at her as she delivered the punch line, and to see her victory in his flashing angry eyes. Perhaps even to make him laugh, or at least acknowledge her. He was looking so tired today.  
  
But instead she felt his hand tremble as she touched it, and after a moment he pulled it hastily from hers. Unsure of what to say, she let it go, and remained silent. James finished the last five minutes of class with his arms crossed, his hands hidden under them.  
  
Across the room, Sirius laughed at Belle's vision he would be getting a pony for Christmas.  
  
*  
  
Later that night, Lily noticed James's absence from the common room. She knew he didn't have practice because Belle was across from her doing her homework. And as hard as she tried to work, the dark circles haunted her.  
  
"Lily, can I borrow your ink, I'm out," asked Eva. As she was answered with silence, Eva tried again. "Lily?" she called. "Lily!"  
  
"Oh, yes. Yeah," Lily said, obviously unaware of the question. Eva just sighed and picked up the ink.  
  
She didn't owe him any sympathy, let alone any favors.  
  
She got up and left the common room, scolding herself with every step for such a sappy, weak disposition.  
  
*  
  
With all the strength in his body James hurled the ball over and over through the goals. He was alone on the field, and the sun was already beginning to disappear behind the hills. When he got tired of flying, he landed, taking the balls back to the locker room; sitting down in his dirty grass stained clothing.  
  
He sat for awhile with his hand around the quaffle, turning it over and over in his hands. James could feel his fists begin to clench, something welling up again inside him. Most notably he could feel the heavy weight of the single piece of paper in his right pocket.  
  
In the darkness of the room, and in his solitude, James felt a warmth dampness cover his eyes and an undeniable rage overtake him - he stood and threw the ball as hard as his arm could manage into the dark, hearing the satisfying thump of a dented locker. Sitting back down, he used his palms to wipe away the few tears that managed to escape. He took out the certificate from an official registry of a city he did not know. He re- read the letter certifying the death of his uncle, his mother's brother, a man he did not know. A man he had never met.  
  
But that was it. That was all of them now, there was no one left. Not even the uncle he never did nor desired to know; an ironic comfort just in his mere existence. James did not cry for him, or for his mother or his father. Those wells had dried years ago. He despaired in the fact he was officially and for all intensive purposes, alone. And that he was the last of them all.  
  
*  
  
After checking several classrooms, Lily strode out onto the Quidditch field. After seeing it empty, she turned toward the locker room, hesitating for just a moment. She decided she didn't care if he thought she was crazy for tracking him down. Walking through the door, pushing it open, there was silence, and only a few streams of fading light from some high placed windows. He was sitting on the bench.  
  
Without turning around he spoke clearly: "Leave."  
  
When Lily did not comply, and instead sat a distance away from him on the bench, he looked up at her. She noticed his face was blank, but he couldn't disguise his eyes. They were defeated, and at the same time filled with rage. She said nothing. James got up and made to leave, striding quickly towards the door.  
  
"Potter - " Lily called. James kept walking. In a split second Lily felt a rush of thoughts and decisions pressing upon her. She didn't trust him, she didn't feel like she should even be bothering. Then again, she knew something was wrong here, awfully wrong.  
  
And she was having to put her fate, her plan in his hands, after he pushed his way into her business. This was not going to do. This was not a one way street. He couldn't break into her things, push his way into her life and then pull this kind of stunt. Now angry herself, she managed to catch his arm before he reached the door, and yanked him back into the room.  
  
James fought her, yelling now. "What the hell do you think you're doing Evans?"  
  
"Oh, don't pull this crap on me James, don't invade my privacy, my life, expect me to let you into my personal business - then act so suspicious and secretive, and walk around yelling screaming and brooding with you-"  
  
"Screw you Evans, bloody hell why don't you leave me alone?" James yelled, trying to yank his arm from her grasp. She pushed him with her other hand against the wall. Lily was surprised at her own strength. He was much bigger than she.  
  
"What do you want from me?" he responded to the push.  
  
Lily was breathing hard now, the exertion of keeping him there was wearing her down. "What do I want Potter? What do I want? The same thing you ask me. I am calling this whole thing off, right now. I don't care what you have on me. I am calling it all off because you're scaring me and I can't trust you - " she screamed back.  
  
At those words the muscles in his body went slack. "No Evans," he said wearily. "You can't do that. It's not an option now. If you are who I think you are, you're going to help me. You can get whatever it is you're going for, and you let me have what I want," he said.  
  
Lily realized she was pressed up against him, holding his wrist and chest up against the wall. "And what is that?" she asked. "Do you want to see Lucius suffer? So all you want is just plain old revenge? Is that why you've gone to all this trouble consorting with me, your enemy, and risking getting expelled Potter? No delusions of ethical grandeur and a desire to help out your fellow man?" she added the last sentence sarcastically, as she had no snow white motives herself. "Just revenge?"  
  
James said nothing, but Lily saw a flash in his eyes that told her that there was truth in her suspicions. That was what he was in it for, and there was nothing she could really do about it. She had no choice. They were both holding each other under some twisted form of blackmail now. Now she knew what he needed.  
  
Lily could see a streak down his cheek, and knew before she had arrived, he had been crying. Now she didn't even bother asking why. It didn't matter, he would never tell her. The few inches that parted their faces told her nothing, his expression now as impassive as before.  
  
She didn't know why, but she let go of his arms and took his face in her hands. Rising slightly on the balls of her feet, she brought her face to his and placed her lips on the streak of water staining his face - kissing away the only tear that was left, betraying his emotion.  
  
Under her hands he felt him tremble again.  
  
Giving him one last look of mixed suspicion and vague understanding, Lily left him, and headed back towards the castle. 


	8. Chapter Eight

9  
  
The walk to Hogesmede did not take long, but the group took their time to enjoy the cool autumn air and fall leaves. James looked at Alice beside him, shivering because she chose to wear a summer tank top and shorts. Feeling bad and also annoyed, James handed her his jacket. Maybe he would just let her keep it and buy another. James gave things away like that all the time. In fact, Sirius may have been wearing his shoes.  
  
Far ahead, Remus, Lily, and Sirius were having a leaf fight, all while making a very noticeable ruckus. Lily screamed at Sirius tackled her and shoved a handful of leaves down the back of her sweater. That was the last straw for Belle, who joined in a last ditch effort to defend her roommate. She jumped on Sirius, who collapsed onto Lily. Then Remus came running at then at full speed, and jumped onto Belle. At the bottom of the jam pile, Lily moaned and said "Remus, I'm going to kill you."  
  
Alice giggled and took James' arm. She did not sense anything wrong with him lately, even if everyone else noticed he was looking a bit tired and drawn. This kind of thing went right by Alice, she preferred to remain cheerful at all times despite the circumstances.  
  
They walked by the pile, as Belle and Lily attempted to get out from underneath the Remus and Sirius sandwich. Alice continued to tell James about how hard Transfiguration was for her, and that it was just too difficult - she didn't understand how anyone was any good at it.  
  
"I know you're a year ahead of me and all," she added, "but maybe you could help me out you know, like a tutor." With that she batted her eyes at James. He thought for a moment.  
  
"You know Alice, if sounds like you really need help," he started. Alice nodded vigorously. "And I have to be honest with you, Sirius is much better at Transfiguration than I am. I bet I can get him to tutor you. "Hey! Sirius, come here," he called.  
  
Alice began to shake her head and mutter out something, but Sirius was already over holding both of Belle's shoes he had pulled off her feet with a spell. She was yelling from afar.  
  
"Yes James?" he asked.  
  
"Alice here needs some help in Transfiguration. Do you think you could help her out?"  
  
"Oh yeah, sure," said Sirius. "Alice, we can start on Monday. Yep, I'm going to whip you into shape. You'll eat, sleep, and dream Transfiguration," he vowed, holding a shoe to his heart and smiling charmingly. His black eyes sparkled.  
  
"Oh, ummmm thank you," said Alice quietly. Realizing not only that her idea had backfired, but also just how much she hated Transfiguration, she became quiet in thought. Suddenly, Sirius was mowed down by an angry Belle, who grabbed one of her shoes and started beating him with it.  
  
James was assaulted by a sudden pile of wet, damp leaves. A grinning Remus was the obvious culprit. For the moment he put aside his thoughts, pushed up his sleeves, and chased his friend down the road.  
  
*  
  
After a day of shopping, lunch, and leaf fighting, the group finally settled in for some ButterBeer at the local tavern. James and Lily had managed not to say too much to each other, so the day had gone smoothly. They still had a few hours before final curfew, so they set up camp at their table in the cavern, talking as it slowly emptied. In the corner was a Muggle invention - Lily fished some quarters out of her bag and announced she was going to start up the Jukebox. No one at the table was aware of what she meant, but they all smiled and nodded.  
  
The machine was pretty old, and Lily was happy to find she could play a large amount of songs for her money, but all the options were Oldies. She punched in her choices, and walked back to the table. When the music began, the table looked at her, then the jukebox, and nodded in understanding.  
  
After awhile, Alice got up and went to talk to some of her sixth year friends at another table.  
  
The first few songs were some old fast ones, and the group continued to talk. But when a slow tune came on, Sirius turned to Belle and held his hand out in a dramatic invitation. She accepted just as dramatically, and they went to goof off on the dance floor. Their dance looked like a twisted version of the Muggle Tango.  
  
"Lily," Remus began, "it is obvious Sirius and Belle have no idea what real dancing looks like. Shall we show them?"  
  
"Why yes Remus, thank you," Lily replied, giving him her hand. Immediately he swept her into his arms, guiding her around the dance floor like an expert. Lily grinned and joined him in the steps, surprising Remus.  
  
"Evans!" he exclaimed, "I had no idea you could dance," he said as she spun her at first out and then back into his grasp.  
  
"You're not completely horrible yourself," she replied, "Where did you learn?"  
  
"Promise you won't laugh," he said, chuckling himself.  
  
"I swear," said Lily, circling him.  
  
Remus sighed. "My mom, she's a bit stuck in the past," he said.  
  
Lily laughed.  
  
"You promised," he chided.  
  
"I know, I know," Lily said, glancing over at the table. James was watching them. Not Belle and Sirius, but her and Remus. Remus looked over as well.  
  
"Our friend looks a bit lonely," he said offhandedly.  
  
"Our friend?" demanded Lily. "I don't recall ever saying that James Potter was my friend."  
  
"Yes, yes, I know." Remus paused, and looked her in the eye. "You two just can't stand each other," he added, with an edge of something secretive in his voice.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean Remus?"  
  
"Oh nothing, Nothing at all. Just making conversation Lily. We haven't had a chance to talk lately," he said, spinning her around. This of course was true. She realized James and Sirius had taken up most of her attention recently, which was in a way very comical and sad.  
  
"You're smooth on your feet Remus," she said playfully. "You must be popular with the ladies."  
  
"Oh yes, Evans, very very popular," he said, laughing.  
  
"Why don't you have a girlfriend Remus?"  
  
"Why the question? Sirius doesn't have a girlfriend, neither does Peter. You should ask them," he said.  
  
"Fair enough, but you see, I don't even know Peter all that well. And Sirius, well, even if they never, ever date, I think his soul mate is definitely Belle," Lily declared, pointing at the two. Belle, much smaller than the tall muscular Sirius, was dipping him. "They're so strange," she said as an afterthought.  
  
"Ok, ok, fair enough. I suppose then, the answer is that all the good ones are taken at this point," Remus conceded.  
  
"Oh really?" Lily scoffed, pretending to be offended. "What about me, Mr. Lupin? I am currently unattached."  
  
"Yes, I guess so," he said with a smile, though he sounded thoroughly unconvinced. "You see Evans, it's just not in the Fates."  
  
"It isn't?" asked Lily.  
  
"No, sadly, it is not. You and I are not meant to be."  
  
"Well then, how would you know this? Since when can you see the future?"  
  
Remus stopped dancing, and got a very serious look on his face. After a second of suspense, he whispered "Since I began Madame Trelawny's Divination class," then burst into laughter.  
  
She too let go of the giggles she had been holding in for a moment. "Yes," he continued, "Now I have seen and know all - and you and I Lily - are not meant to be."  
  
Even though they were both laughing, Lily could sense there was some ring of truth to what he was saying. He knew something, or a least thought he did. She wondered what it was. There was a look in his eye, as if there was really something she didn't know.  
  
"Okay then, 'All-Knowing Lupin,' then tell me who I will marry, or at least the lotto numbers for next week," Lily begged.  
  
At first Remus looked confused. "Lily, I don't know what a Lotto is. But as for the marrying thing, I just can't tell you that!" he exclaimed.  
  
"What? Why not?" she demanded.  
  
"Because, it just doesn't work that way. And it's not supposed to happen that way," he said, then quickly followed it with, "So you see, I can only reveal some of my powers to you now, all other questions you will have to find out on your own, unless you happen to have a large number of gold Galleons in your pocket."  
  
Lily laughed and said no. The song ended.  
  
Remus looked at her for a moment, and then said, "You know Lily, sometimes it doesn't hurt to give fate a little kick in the ass to get it started." He put his hands on each side of her face, leaned in, and kissed her on the forehead. Lily was touched by the gesture, and gave him a hug in return.  
  
Lily didn't see it, but Remus was smiling over her shoulder.  
  
*  
  
James took another sip of his ButterBeer, which he had hardly touched since coming into the Tavern. He watched Sirius and Belle disturb and scare the other customers with their antics and "dancing," and finally settled on watching Remus and Lily. Remus had pulled her in close, wrapping his arm entirely around her waist, and the other held her hand, as he rested the entertwined digits on his chest. They seemed to be having a very serious conversation, but they both burst out laughing regularly.  
  
They looked very well together, Remus and Lily. James decided that they must enjoy each other's company, but he should have known that before - after all, they were friends. And he decided from that distance that Remus could probably smell Lily's hair.  
  
Maybe if Remus dated Lily, she could stay out of his way most of the time. Perhaps Madame Trelawny would see they shared the same "energy" and switch them partners. James had a moment of joy at the prospect, an idea of the peacefulness his life would contain if Lily were socially missing.  
  
James watched as Remus touched Lily's face and kissed her on the forehead. Then Lily wrapped her arms around him in a hug.  
  
James' heart exploded.  
  
His mind and heart were at war. His head had waged war against Evans long ago, he hated her - from her dark blood red hair to the soles of her feet he burned with contempt for each inch of her.  
  
And with every fiber of his being he longed to touch her. Her hair, her face - when she had put her hand over his in class he literally shook. When she had kissed his cheek, he almost lost it. The want was so bad that he was shaking within proximity of her. And James didn't want her to know, under any circumstance. He didn't even understand it what was going on, they couldn't go long without bursting into an argument. But then again, he needed to touch her. To the point where felt his legs begin to move against his will, carrying him across the dance floor of the tavern.  
  
His hands had already begun to shake. Lily had chosen another slow song.  
  
He heard himself approach the two, he heard himself ask to cut in. He saw the look of shock on Lily's face, then one of suspicion, all through a slow, muffled haze.  
  
Remus did not put up the fight he expected. In fact, his friend just smiled and backed away, handing Lily's hand to James. He stared at it for a moment, and then took it in his own.  
  
*  
  
Lily moved in towards James. If he wanted to dance, she would dance. Hopefully he wasn't up to anything. She felt their skin make contact as he took he hand, and thought she heard him take in a sharp breath. But then again, the music was loud, and she could have been mistaken. He wrapped his other arm around her, but kept a neutral distance. He was too tall for her to see his face, so she tilted her eyes up to him. They were closed.  
  
"James?" she asked.  
  
"Yes Evans?" he replied after a moment of hesitation.  
  
"Number one, why do you want to dance with me - number two, why aren't you dancing with Alice?" She decided to be up front.  
  
James did not answer right away. He took a minute while dancing, then explained, "I am giving Remus a chance to talk with Katie Bell, that Ravenclaw over there," he motioned, and sure enough, Remus was talking to Katie Bell. "Secondly, I can't dance with Alice, because I am dancing with you," he said, as if the question itself were obvious.  
  
"I see," said Lily, satisfied with his explanation. But something was off. She could feel something almost emanating from him, as if silently he was begging her for - what? She did not understand James Potter. Just yesterday he had told her to leave him the 'bloody hell alone.' And he had meant it.  
  
Lily gave up on it, and suddenly realized the hand that held hers was shaking slightly. Not as much as in the class or the locker room, but it seemed he was concentrating on keeping it steady. She looked at his closed eyes; they were rimmed with dark circles. He looked so worn. Lily moved in closer, till her nose was almost touching his shirt. She felt his arm wrap tighter around her; the hand holding her own began to tremble more violently. In fact, now that she was closer, she felt a tremor through all of him. Fascinated, she laid her head against him, fitting into the crook of his neck. Not only was he shaking, but she felt his heart racing. She heard him gasp even though it was barely audible.  
  
The sound caught her own breath in her throat.  
  
She was completely enclosed in him. She felt and heard every movement. And there was a need for something, a desperate want. She didn't know if it had anything to do with her, as she may just be a warm body while James assisted Remus with Katie; and who knows, Alice could be next. James was known for how many girls he'd dated. Maybe he was just so exhausted he couldn't do anything else.  
  
She took her hand from him, and wrapped it around his neck to join the other. Slowly, she slid it into his hair at the nape of his neck, the unruly but stylish mess. She ran it though her fingers, pulling it softly, then sliding her hand back down into it again. With her other arm, she pulled him closer and lower. She remembered when they had played chess and she had wanted so badly to touch him for just a moment. Outside the locker room on the day Belle got hurt, she was tempted. So now she did.  
  
Because if he asked her to dance, then they were going to do it right. Lily gave no thought to the consequence or significance of her actions. She wanted James to be closer, so she simply pulled him there.  
  
*  
  
There was no music for James.  
  
He had played off his asking her to dance quite well, and given two excellent excuses. But he couldn't hide the shaking, the heartbeat, his nervousness. At first he kept his eyes closed to concentrate, and keep calm. This was the girl he disliked, that he argued with constantly. Yes, good. Ok, everything made sense.  
  
When she moved closer to him, he was overwhelmed. When she put her head on his chest he was in disbelief and drowned in the smell of her hair. But when she put her hand in his hair and played with the back of his neck, it was all he could do to keep his body from convulsing. His knees threatened to give out, and he shut his eyes to try and disguise the wave of severe emotion, even though she couldn't see his face.  
  
This was Lily Evans. James hates Lily Evans.  
  
He almost moaned in agony when her hand brushed the back of his neck lightly. The world made no sense anymore.  
  
And then the song was over, and she was walking away. 


	9. Chapter Nine

9  
  
The walk back to the castle was slow; each one took their time, walking lazily down the road. The threat of curfew violation did not seem to bother anyone; instead they passed the excursion in silence - even Sirius. Well, almost. He had had one too many butter beers, and Lily listened to him ramble on and on to Remus about his ideas to engineer a faster broomstick. Arabella was observing the beautiful nature scene, and Alice lagged behind with James. Lily liked the feeling of the cold fall wind. She was not the least bit tired; finally she decided to take care of some necessary business that very evening.  
  
At the entrance to the castle, Lily paused. As James walked past, she subtly touched his arm, causing him to turn immediately. Before Alice realized he was distracted and came to investigate, Lily whispered "Meet me in the common room after they're asleep."  
  
James gave a subtle nod, an indication he understood. He turned around and rejoined the group. Lily followed.  
  
*  
  
Later, hearing the familiar breathing and sounds of her friends asleep, Lily crept out of the room. They had not been looking when she got into bed; she had left on a pair of jeans. She grabbed a sweater for later, and headed out the door.  
  
Downstairs, he was waiting for her. He was holding the cloak.  
  
"Where do you want to go?" asked James.  
  
"It seems you're the expert on places to go in the castle at night, you choose. Somewhere there is no chance of us being interrupted," she replied.  
  
"Alright," he replied, after a moment of thought. He stood, and motioned her to the portrait hole. Once there, he covered them both, and the door swung open. There was such silence in the castle that the simple noise of the door on its hinges seemed to echo and resonate in every hall. Lily felt it to be unbearably loud.  
  
They walked slowly to be silent. Not only was there complete silence, but there was a stillness to everything around them, as if every object were waiting in the dark, frozen. James led Lily down what seemed to be the darkest, smallest corridors. There were many staircases, and Lily knew they were moving towards a tower. She guessed the west tower, a small structure used mostly now for storage. When it seemed they could get no farther, James led her into a room with a low, wooden beamed ceiling. From there, he unlatched a lock above them and pulled a trap door complete with sliding ladder down.  
  
"It looks like the ladder to our attic," commented Lily.  
  
James seemed to understand her comparison. He motioned her up the stairs first, and when they had both ascended, he pulled the door up and shut behind them. Lily pulled out her wand.  
  
"Luminous," she whispered.  
  
The room was somewhat small, but only because it's walls were lined with bookshelves, and in turn those were stocked with old books. There was a small dark wooden table, low to the ground, and several old chairs. The fabric appeared as if it used to be velvet, but had torn and matted in places with age. Lily figured the professors had tired of fixing them with magic, and opted for new furniture. Some of the books were out of date, some were extra copies of what Lily recognized was already in the library. Yes, this was just another storage space. Too small for a classroom, too far from the dormitories. She looked at James.  
  
"Filch and the cat don't usually patrol this tower often," he explained, "and if they managed to get up here, I doubt he would remember the trap door, and that there is a storage attic up here. Plus no one can hear us. We're pretty safe."  
  
Lily nodded, and went to the table. She managed to light several old, half used candles with magic, and sat in one of the chairs. James took a seat next to her.  
  
Lily didn't bother to hesitate, she dove right in. She took two books out a bag she had brought. One was the small black book James recognized. The other was also somewhat familiar to him - it read "A History of Hogwarts."  
  
Lily clasped her hands, leaned her elbows on her knees, and leaned forward, the candlelight playing dangerously on her features.  
  
"James, I've been lying to you," she began. Staring him straight in the eye, she continued without emotion. "It's true that my parents have no magical powers. Neither did any of my grandparents, in fact, my family has been muggle for a long time. However, they haven't always been."  
  
James was confused at this omission. It is true that after years of living without magic, it would only be natural for a family to acclimate themselves to a non-magical culture. But that had to be impossible - Lily being the only Evans in years to have magic in her veins - what happened to the rest of her family?  
  
"Putting that aside for the moment," Lily continued, "I need you to look at this." With that she opened the book to one of the chapters discussing the founding members of the school. Griffyndor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, Slytherin. Lily stopped on a portrait of Salazaar Slytherin, and pushed the book over the James.  
  
"Look, James," she said. James took the volume; he had seen this portrait before, many times in his history classes. He studied the picture closely, noting nothing exceptional about it. He turned skeptically to Lily.  
  
"What?" he asked.  
  
"His hands, James," Lily said.  
  
James looked at his hands. Sure enough, as had somehow managed to allude his attention before, Slytherin was holding something. A small black book. James caught on to Lily's implication. He laughed.  
  
"Lily, seriously. You can't honestly think that this could be the same book. There must be thousands of small black books around, and this was so long ago. What makes you think this is the same, and how would you know that anyways?" James asked condescendingly.  
  
With that sentence, he pushed the book and picture back towards Lily. Lily was viably irritated at his attitude, but held her patience, it seemed that she recognized what she was going to say would be difficult to accept.  
  
"James, I told you my family wasn't always a muggle family. There aren't many left alive that even remember a time when their own grandparents practiced magic. It has all but died out. I had to dig James, I had to dig around to find out why I of all people ended up like this, with magic," Lily paused, and leaned back a bit in her chair.  
  
"The only one I could find was my grandmother. She is very old, and she barely remembers the story as told to her by her older relatives. That and she was terrified, scared to talk about it, scared that I had even asked. But she did tell me bits and pieces - I know small parts of the story. It seems that long ago, when Slytherin was separating from Hogwarts and the other founders, there was a great deal of unrest in the world of magic. I know my family was a wizarding family, she told me that much. I also know that somehow, though I have no idea how or why, Slytherin stripped my family of all their powers. We were cursed, my grandmother said, she said the legend was that he brought his wrath down my ancestors and all those to come after, completely destroying the chance for us to use magic. At that point, my grandmother began to get tears in her eyes - she apologized for telling me the story, she claims that it's just a tale, a myth meant to scare. She almost refused to talk about it again, and answered only one more question - But anyways, I was skeptical, but the rest of my family either doesn't know about the world of magic, or lives in denial of it. How could she have known the names, the circumstances - how could she have made it up?"  
  
"Wait, wait, wait Lily," interrupted James, "There is a problem with your story. If your family was cursed, then how is it that you have magical powers?"  
  
Lily was silent for a moment, then whispered, "That was the only other question she would answer, before she was silent on the subject forever. I asked her just that, how was it then I'm a witch?"  
  
Lily looked up at James, and spoke slowly. "Her face masked over in this kind of blunt horror. She looked absolutely terrified. All she would say was: 'You're not supposed to. It's supposed to be impossible, Lily. There's something wrong.' I didn't know what to think - then I let it go," she finished.  
  
James got chills at the realization there was something wholly unnatural about Lily Evans. But then again, Lily seemed to know more, or have more to say than she was telling him. He sensed danger in her, but not necessarily towards himself. Still, he did not trust her.  
  
Lily seemed to sense his uneasiness, and moved on to more business. "Anyways, you asked me how I know that this is Salazaar Slytherin's book. I saw Lucius Malfoy take it out of his trunk at the railways station at the beginning of term. For a split second I saw it in his hand. I immediately remembered the portrait, it flashed into my mind like a shot of lightning. And I knew. Just like I knew the sky is blue, James, I felt it. And I knew I had to get it, I had to take it from him. I had to know what was in it. Why would such an evil and powerful family entrust such a valuable possession to their son, who is going to Hogwarts?"  
  
"Well that one is easy Lily. It's the last place the ministry will look. People's houses are getting searched; checks are everywhere, what with the suspicious activity going on. And isn't it clever to stick it right under the enemy's nose, where they wouldn't even think to search?" James added with a laugh. "But the thing I don't get is why you care. What do you have to do with the Malfoys, the Slytherins, with any of it? Where do you fit in?" he asked her.  
  
"He knows who I am," she said in a low voice.  
  
"What? Who are you talking about?" James said a bit too loudly.  
  
"You know James. You know exactly who I mean," she replied, and James could see Lily did in fact know he was acutely aware of who she was referring to.  
  
"They know, they know who I am, what I am, and what I'm not supposed to be," she said.  
  
"How would you know that?"  
  
Lily paused for a moment, and seemed deep in thought. Finally, she responded, "I've had dreams, I sense something horrible in them, but I don't know what it is. And I've been followed before, I can tell when someone is behind me. Sometimes, in large crowds, I feel eyes on me. You know, you can tell when someone is looking at you; you feel the weight of their stare. I feel many. I know I am being watched. I don't think they pose a threat right now but - "  
  
"But what?" asked James.  
  
"I think they're coming for me. Or they will eventually. I don't know why, I couldn't tell you why I have magic powers, or why I think a bunch of sinister villain types are observing me from afar, or how He knows who I am. All I know is that this is the book James, and I was supposed to get it. I need to know what's in it. I've heard before that everything happens for a reason - I have no idea about that or what I'm meant for, but this book it part of it," she finished.  
  
Lily had left herself slightly vulnerable at the end of her story. James knew she was waiting to hear what he thought.  
  
This was not what he expected, but that was irrelevant. He sensed no tone of deceit to make him wary of her motives, and if she gave no indication of evil, he could make no objections. She had her reasons, he had his. Anything to achieve an end - to find out what was in the book and use it against its owners. Besides, felt somehow that this much, this little bit she had told him, was the truth.  
  
"Evans, what will you do when you unlock the book, and find out what's in it?"  
  
Lily was silent. She did not answer.  
  
"Well, Evans?"  
  
"I told you I didn't have to answer all your questions. Besides, I've said enough for today," Lily said.  
  
James didn't press her. Instead he followed her gaze to a candle on the table, burnt so low it was drowning its own flame. 


	10. Chapter Ten

James and Lily walked silently back to the common room; the sun threatened to rise as the sky changed into a slightly lighter shade of blue. There were no incidents along the way, Lily noticed that James' face remained unreadable. She did not care for his opinion at this point anyways, he had dragged himself into the situation. They had made plans to meet later on Thursday night, so there was nothing left to be said as they shed the invisibility cloak and parted ways.  
  
Lily wearily climbed the stairs to her dormitory, changing into her pajamas and sneaking into her bed. The lack of sleep was not a concern for Lily, she rarely slept much anymore and found it wasn't necessary for her to function. Still, she found herself drifting off as the sky gradually became brighter, and thoughts of her family, past and James slowly drifted away.  
  
*  
  
That Monday Arabella Figg and Lily Evans sat in Transfiguration, doodling on Belle's parchment with a quill. Eva was struggling with a spell over to their right, her dark hair pulled messily into a ponytail, loose strands framing her soot smudged face. Her attempt at making a hedgehog into a salamander was unsuccessful, and when the cloud of smoke cleared all Eva had was a very angry looking and green hedgehog. It waddled off the desk, and Sirius went chasing after it.  
  
Lily and Belle used this distraction to have a conversation, and the class one by one joined the pursuit of the hedgehog. It had just run under a desk and Sirius knocked his head trying to get it. One injury already.  
  
"Sirius asked me to the Winter Ball," Belle said.  
  
"Oh did he?" replied Lily, none too surprised.  
  
"Well, he needs someone to help him with a project," Belle answered, winking mischievously. Lily sighed, wondering what havoc those two would wreak on the unsuspecting student body.  
  
"Yeah, next Hogesmede trip we have to go shopping for dresses. Eva is going with that Ravenclaw boy we see her with, but won't admit they're an item yet. It's perfect really; they're both bloody brilliant. I wonder how she ended up in Griffyndor anyways," Belle said as she watched Eva follow the hedgehog. It had crawled behind a bookcase - she was crouched making hedgehog noises at it and calling to it softly. Sirius appeared behind her with a stick.  
  
"No! Sirius, get away from Irving with that!" Eva cried.  
  
"Irving??? You named the evil hedgehog???" he yelled.  
  
"Yes, I will get him, I'm sorry about your head. But he's not evil, he's scared."  
  
"Oh no, Eva. You're all wrong. Just step away from the bookcase, that thing is dangerous." With that Eva moved aside, hanging her head and looking very nervous. She peered over Sirius's shoulder as he reached behind the bookcase. He seemed to feel around for a moment, but then a look of success and victory came over his face as he withdrew his hand, clutching the hedgehog. Almost immediately, his face contorted again into a grimace of pain, and several of the hedgehog's quills became lodged in his hand.  
  
"Ow, blast," he yelled, dropped Irving, and started to hop up and down, cradling his hand. Eva picked up the animal with gloves, holding it close and petting it softly. Irving seemed to relax and settle down as they made their way back to the table, where Professor McGonagall would fix him. Sirius was still hoping around the room.  
  
Lily and Belle, being used to these sort of occurrences by now, didn't even blink an eye.  
  
"Well I hate to burst your bubble Belle, but I forgot all about the dance, and I don't have a date yet," Lily said.  
  
"Lily, the dance is still over a month away. Lots of people are just starting to get dates now, and trust me, you will have no trouble getting one," she added. Belle secretly knew of many a male student (you hear things in a Quidditch lockeroom) who would give anything to have Lily Evans on their arm. She was, as Belle had heard her described, quite striking.  
  
"So even though you may be the last one dateless, not all hope is lost," she laughed.  
  
"Last one, you say? Who, may I ask, is everyone else going with?"  
  
"Remus is going with Katie Bell, and James in going with Alice," Belle replied, watching Lily's face carefully. She had thought something suspicious about their dance last Saturday in Hogesmede.  
  
Lily had figured those would be the two boys' dates. "Well, we'll see what happens with me and the dance. But I will gladly help you and Eva find dresses," she replied cheerfully.  
  
Sirius had by this time plucked the quills from his hand, and the results were quite gory. Professor McGonagall was trying to persuade him into seeing Madame Pomfrey. Lily grinned a bit, picked up her quill and began to doodle again.  
  
*  
  
Lily picked at her dinner, and noticed off-handedly that James was picking at his as well. He pushed his carrots around the plate, circling around the potatoes and back again. He failed to notice her observing - he was also half listening to Remus, who was describing some of the finer points of defending against more violent poltergeists.  
  
Sirius was recounting his harrowing adventure to a group of first years - who, wide-eyed, listened to his tale of the battle between himself and the giant mutant hedgehog that threatened the entire class.  
  
"It was gigantic, violent, frothing at the mouth," he said, making adequate hand gestures that Lily might compare to a Muggle showing how big the fish was.  
  
"It was really dangerous?" asked one particular girl with blond pigtails. She had many frights this year already, what with the giant "man-eating" plant in the Herbology greenhouse, and poor Ian Randall - what his fate was, no one seemed to know. Last Lily had heard, he had moved to Costa Rica and was working as a one eyed, three toed mercenary. She sighed into her pumpkin juice.  
  
"Yes," came a voice from across the table. It was James, having caught wind of Sirius's exploits. "It was massive, and it tried to kill poor Eva here, almost got her with its razor-sharp claws. But not before Sirius performed a spell and returned it to its normal size, bravely captured it, and returned it to its cage," he finished.  
  
All heads turned immediately toward Eva, who was taking a bite out of her pot roast. At first she had an annoyed expression, but after swallowing, she took on the most serious, devastated look Lily had ever seen her with.  
  
"I feared for my life," she stated, then turned her attention back to her pot roast.  
  
Sirius was delighted she would play along, and continued scaring the pants off the first year crowd. Meanwhile, Peter, who was never there, sat down next to Lily, Belle, and James.  
  
"Hey guys," he said.  
  
"Well, if it isn't Peter. Where have you been?" asked James.  
  
"I've been having some trouble with my classes," he replied quickly. "What I was meaning to ask is if you guys are planning on going to dueling club next week."  
  
Lily thought this was a strange question to be asking her. But then again, he might not be aware of what happened last time; he said he had been busy.  
  
"Oh, well no," said Lily. "I think I'll skip this one, I've got some work to do."  
  
"Oh," said Peter. "James?"  
  
"I've got some things to do as well. Maybe next time though," he said, again studying his carrots.  
  
"That's too bad. Well, I'm off to do some homework," Peter said, getting up.  
  
"What subject?" asked Belle suddenly. When he looked a bit taken aback by her quick question, she softened it with, "Just in case, you need some help, you know."  
  
"Potions," replied Peter, and headed toward the dungeon. As he left, Belle narrowed her eyes, but very slightly. It was so subtle, Lily was sure she was the only one who noticed. She almost scolded Belle, but then held her tongue. Peter wasn't easy to like, she knew. He always seemed nervous and jumpy, ever since they had met in first year. But that fact made Lily want to put him at ease.  
  
"Be nice," she whispered.  
  
"Me? I'm always nice. Don't be lecturing me Lily Evans," Belle said with a smile.  
  
"Of course," agreed Lily. "It was silly of me - and I will try to remember that at the Winter Ball," she laughed, alluding to the scheme Belle and Sirius were cooking up.  
  
"The dance, eh?" came a voice from above them. They both looked up to see Eva's date standing there, along with a friend. Eva put down the pot roast, smiled, and invited them to sit down.  
  
"Lily, Belle, this is Scott, my date. And this is his friend Sebastian," she made introductions as the boys took a seat. "They're both in Ravenclaw," she said.  
  
"Yeah, I think we have you two in our Advanced Care of Magical Creatures class," said Belle. The boys nodded in recognition.  
  
"Yes, sorry we didn't introduce ourselves earlier, we've been having some trouble reigning in our Hippogriffs," added Lily.  
  
Sebastian smiled at her. "Yes, I've seen both of you during that unfortunate incident with the Purple FlobberWorms. How were you supposed to know that if you fed them lettuce, they explode?"  
  
"I know," Lily said, returning the smile. "Those purple ones are tricky. It snuck into the bag, and then it was all downhill from there."  
  
Lily noticed that he had dark hair, like James and Sirius, but it was a few inches longer, and shaggier. His eyes were dark, almost black it seemed, but warm all the same. Also, he was wearing a Muggle shirt and jeans, the shirt having long sleeves and being a charcoal color. She wondered if he came from a normal family as well.  
  
He noticed her examination. "I've never been really comfortable in those robes," he admitted. "I wish I could wear my usual clothes to class."  
  
Lily smiled again. "Me too, sometimes," she replied. Looking over, she noticed Eva and Scott sitting somewhat close and talking quietly. Belle was eating quietly, but Lily could tell she was trying not to giggle at her and Sebastian.  
  
Sebastian looked over at Scott, and turned to Lily. "I was going to teach Scott how to rollerskate, he thinks it's the funniest idea he's ever heard. But he seems a bit busy right now. Would you like to go instead?" he asked, somehow knowing she was from a Muggle family and hoping she knew how.  
  
Lily laughed. "I haven't done that since I was ten!" she exclaimed. "Yeah, sure I would love to."  
  
Lily began to get up from her seat, when a voice interrupted her.  
  
"I thought we had a Divination project to do," James said, and Lily became aware he had heard their conversation.  
  
Turning and facing him, Lily replied, "It's not due till next week. Besides, here comes Alice. Looks like you have your hands full anyway," she added, taking Sebastian's arm, ignoring James' look of annoyance, and leaving.  
  
*  
  
"Oh my gosh, James, there's something floating in my pumpkin juice."  
  
"You don't say," replied James, still steering around his carrot. He saw Alice frowning at her goblet from the corner of his eye. Lily had obviously found out that he was taking Alice to the dance. Not like she cared, but it would give her ammunition to insult him until the whole thing was over. Alice had actually asked him to the Ball, and he could think of no reason to say no. Alice was nice enough, and he had no particular attachment to anyone at Hogwarts to prevent him from accepting. Absolutely none.  
  
There was no substance in his attraction to Lily, he told himself. She was a beautiful woman - it was only normal. Otherwise she was hardly tolerable. They had a strictly business relationship, and after it was all done, he would do his best to get as far away from her as possible.  
  
"He's going to ask her," squeaked Eva from across the table.  
  
"Who?" asked Alice, apparently having extracted the offending object from her pumpkin juice.  
  
"Sebastian. He's going to ask Lily," said Eva.  
  
"How do you know?" asked Belle.  
  
"He's had a crush on her for awhile," admitted Scott. "But he's kind of shy, and he had no way of meeting her until I became friends with Eva," he said quietly.  
  
"That's adorable!" cooed Alice. "And he's so handsome," and after a moment added, "But not as handsome as you James." She then grabbed his arm as squeezed it.  
  
James didn't hear her or feel the squeeze. He put down his fork and looked at the door they had exited.  
  
"I don't know Potter, you've been losing it a bit lately," joked Belle, ruffling his unkempt hair.  
  
Trying to act natural, James played along. "Figg, I wouldn't start with me. You've earned yourself ball duty next practice. Good luck with those bludgers," he said laughing. He stood and ducked away as she made a playful punch at his arm, and an exasperated noise.  
  
As he was leaving, James noticed eyes on him from across the room. A quick glance let him know it was Lucius. There was suspicion in the glare; James wondered how much he knew - about him - about Lily - and what new information he would inevitably learn about her and her family through his connections. Maybe he knew already.  
  
But James put it aside. He took a long stroll back to the dormitory, taking time to look at pictures. Passing a window, he studied the front of the castle as the sun continued to set. He could see them on the pavement in the courtyard. Lily was a horrible skater, or at least James thought she must be by the fact he couldn't seem to stop as she speed toward a giant stone statue. Luckily, Sebastian reached out and grabbed her, slowing her down. Then it seemed he was teaching her how to use the brakes on skates. When he turned around, Lily pulled out her wand, and turned his skates hot pink with purple fuzzy tassels.  
  
Finally noticing, He began to chase her, and James could hear her screams of protest and laughter. They skated out of his sight.  
  
He could not, for the life of him, understand Muggle entertainment sometimes. He rolled on one shoulder than had been leaning against the wall, and slid down the stone slab till he sat on the ground. He put his arms around his knees, and thought quietly in the growing dark. 


	11. Chapter Eleven

Thursday evening found James and Lily in a secluded corner of the library, quietly pouring over old texts and letters. In order to find the correct spell to unlock the book, there was going to be first and foremost a lot of research involved. Neither had any idea how long it would take, Lily said that so far it had been a trial and error process. All both knew was that they could not move or take action until they had figured out how to get the information in the book. James was secretly worried that Lucius, already suspicious, would retaliate and retrieve the book before they deciphered its contents. Because of that fact and after Lily's example, James was also studying more about Defense Against the Dark Arts.  
  
There was silence in the library. James looked across the table at Lily. She had pulled her hair back into a ponytail, and there were ink marks on her hands. When she rested her face unknowingly on those hands, her face became stained as well. Occasionally she made a black thumbprint while turning pages, but still failed to notice the ink.  
  
"Are you done with that volume on charmed books?" she asked him, never looking up.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I want to look at it."  
  
"Afraid I'm not thorough enough?" James asked. There was a flash of green and a smirk from across the table.  
  
"Be quiet Evans. Besides, at the rate you're going, we should be done by the time we're forty or so," he added.  
  
There was silence for awhile as they thumbed through more charms reference manuals. As James felt himself grow more and more frustrated at his inability to find any information, Lily got up and moved to a seat across the table, directly next to him. In fact, when she pulled out the chair and sat, she was extremely close.  
  
"Look at this paragraph James, about the use of some potions and substances that can be spread across pages to reveal writing in some Southern European countries -" Lily continued as she pointed out the passage in question. "Read it, what do you think? Is potions a good subject for you, because I struggle horribly in it."  
  
"Where? There?" James asked, pointing.  
  
"No, other page," Lily correctly, pointing out the correct area. Her arm crossed and brushed his. Her skin was soft and smooth, and as she leaned over, her breath distantly touched his neck. James began to feel dizzy, tense.  
  
"Oh. Yeah, I'll read it in just a second, I'm just going to put his one book away, it doesn't have anything interesting in it," he said, quickly getting up and grabbing a random book off the table. He hoped he had read it through well, if not, he would have to come back later.  
  
After walking nonchalantly around the corner and through a few stacks, James heavily exhaled, and extended an arm to brace himself against a bookcase. His knees felt weak; he took a moment and collected himself before reassessing the situation. He had to get out of the library. There was no focusing on the project right now. He had to think of an excuse - Having no idea where the book really went, he shoved it up on the shelf above him and took another breath.  
  
"That's not where the book goes, James," said Lily from behind him. He turned to see her frowning. That goes in the Dark Arts section, this is Botany. I saw you going the wrong way," she explained.  
  
Lily walked up beside him and took the book from the shelf, having to balance on the balls of her feet to reach the shelf. She was right next to him.  
  
James froze, and something in him threatened to snap.  
  
*  
  
Lily watched James walk in the complete wrong direction. She wondered how often he had actually been in the library, and thought she better stop him and save some time. Pausing for a moment as she saw him disappear, she rethought her actions.  
  
She remembered studying, and feeling his eyes on her. There was a feeling coming from him that reminded her of Hogesmede - and she couldn't help but respond to it. It sat on the air between them and crackled with tension.  
  
What was it? Anger? Contempt? Boredom and frustration? Regret for becoming involved, for all she knew he thought she was crazy. James Potter couldn't stand her, and vice versa. This was a very professional situation. But this did not help the way Lily felt.  
  
Closing her eyes, Lily leaned back in her seat. She remembered the feel of her fingers in his hair, its smooth texture. His insufferable arrogance. The skin on the back of his neck. The way he always found away to annoy her. His eyes in the locker room that one afternoon, the rage and the passion for things Lily did not know. His shaking hands.  
  
The library remained silent and still as Lily berated herself for such thoughts - and as her mind screamed in protest, she got up and walked in the direction James had gone. Lily told herself she was just going to correct his direction, as he wandered lost in the Botany section.  
  
She found him leaning against a bookshelf a couple of isles over, near the back of the large library. After announcing herself and retrieving the book, she looked up at him and saw he was quite pale.  
  
"Are you alright Potter?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine - just a bit tired I guess. Maybe I should check this out and read it up in my dormitory."  
  
"We have to be careful about what books we check out. Those records are visible to everyone in the school. We should only check out the general or non-descript ones. I don't think this one counts," Lily responded.  
  
He nodded, his eyes down and away from her. Lily watched her hand move up and brush a piece of hair away from his face, studying it. There was something wrong. Her hand felt his forehead for a temperature and then moved down to his cheek. In order to reach it, she had moved directly in front of him. James head was hung; he was still bent slightly as a result of leaning on the bookcase. At the touch of her hand, his eyes closed.  
  
"Are you sure you're all right?" Lily asked. Suddenly, the weight of what she felt built inside her all this time threatened to detonate. Rapidly she lost control of her actions. James said nothing, only took in a few sharp breaths. Her other hand found the opposite side of his face, and she gently pulled him toward her.  
  
"James?" Meant to sound like a question, but when Lily uttered this quietly it sounded more like a statement, his name, an invitation.  
  
When his face was almost touching her own, she saw his eyes - they were shut tight. She felt his body struggle with itself over something - the arm that supported him began to tremble.  
  
There was no control at this point. Lily knew nothing else but the desire to consume and be consumed by James Potter. Shutting her own eyes, Lily brushed her bottom lip slowly along his, and felt an explosion of fire. Pausing, she then wrapped her lips softly in-between his own. The current that shot through her was so intense she pulled back after a few seconds and gasped.  
  
His chest was heaving now. He said nothing, but after a moment his eyes raised to meet hers. Gray to green, his eyes were blazing. The current between them grew stronger, Lily took a step back.  
  
There was one moment of silence, one moment of absolute stillness. Potter looked at Evans, Evans looked at Potter. The room spun.  
  
Before she knew what was happening, Lily found herself surrounded by James' arms, swept up in an almost violent embrace. He held her tightly, kissing her with a hunger Lily had never felt. His mouth was incredibly warm and soft; her arms went around him, her fingers digging with equal force into his back in response to James' seeming need for her. His fingers found the elastic that held her hair and pulled it out, letting a dark auburn cascade fall all over her shoulders and back. His hands ran themselves through it, tangled themselves in it. His fingertips grazed her neck, and she felt a moan escape her throat. Lily kissed him deeper; he pressed her against a shelf full of books. The world around them crumbled.  
  
Suddenly James pulled away, and took a few steps back. Breathing heavily, he had a look of absolute horror on his face.  
  
"Oh my god, what have I done?" he said quietly.  
  
Lily felt a moment of shock. Everything she felt had been wrong. This wasn't what he wanted - he was appalled at her, at what had just happened. Determined not to look upset at all, and seeing as she wasn't truly convinced she really cared anyways, Lily simply said "Sorry Potter."  
  
James still said nothing, he just looked at her with that same expression.  
  
"Look, it won't happen again," she added, with a little laugh thrown in at the end. Did she really care anyways? What had just happened? Why was the room still spinning?  
  
James still didn't say anything. He just turned, and started to walk out the library. Lily moved slowly after him towards their table. He simply passed it, didn't even look at it. His books, quills and things were still sitting there. Lily didn't bother to call after him, she just sat down and put her head in her hands. She supposed James could come back on his own later for his things.  
  
Lily knew that they would never speak of it to anyone; they couldn't even give an explanation as to why they were spending time together in the first place. No, the exploits of Potter and Evans in all aspects had and would remain a secret. Lily had no doubt of this, and that she would now have no problem maintaining their usual distant relationship.  
  
She should have known better. Moving on, Lily gathered her books and headed back to the dormitory.  
  
*  
  
Now outside the library, James broke into a run. He headed straight for the castle doors, and threw himself into the night air. Running with no purpose he crossed the grounds and headed out towards some quiet fields and the pond. Once he was a considerable distance from the castle, James collapsed on the ground and lay down.  
  
Curling up somewhat, he breathed laboriously after running so fast so far.  
  
After some time James sat up and put his arms around his knees. His head rested on his knees, eyes shut.  
  
He felt as if he was slowly dying. James had never wanted any so bad in all his life, the way he wanted her. He never even thought that kind of feeling was possible. In fact, it threatened to overtake him, fill him up.  
  
There was no room in his life for this, especially not when it was Evans. He was not destined for happiness, or a happily ever after. His plans, Lily's plans, against the rising dark forces in their world, that was what mattered. Nothing could get it the way, especially not his feelings.  
  
James didn't remember what happened to set off the explosion, but only he let himself go, let himself take advantage of her. She was probably insulted that he had let himself lose control like that -  
  
He had to leave the castle. He had to literally get a distance away from her, or else the thing that drew him towards her would inevitably drag him right back again tonight. Even now, he wanted to go find her. To tell her he was sorry.  
  
No. James was capable of control, especially self-control. There would be no more incidents between him and Lily. He would make sure of it.  
  
Walking back to the castle in the dark, James saw a light in the Griffyndor tower common room. He only hoped it wasn't her; he had absolutely no strength left this evening. 


	12. Chapter twelve

"You know why I love you Potter?" called a voice through the chilled air.  
  
"No, why is that exactly?" James called back.  
  
"You make my job so much easier," shot back Arabella, blocking yet another attempt James made at scoring a goal during Quidditch practice. "See," she continued, patrolling the hoops, "I've hardly had to work at all this entire practice. In fact, you guys are doing so badly I'm starting to worry. Why don't we call it a day?" she suggested.  
  
James, usually one for longer practice, gave up without a fight. "Sure Belle, sounds good to me. I have some homework to do anyways." In truth, he just wasn't feeling up to flying, or concentrating on the game. It had been almost a week since he and Lily had met in the library. Putting off working on their project wouldn't work for long - they needed to accomplish their goal, and would have to talk to each other eventually. James suspected that's why Lily approached him after Transfiguration today and asked him if meeting on Friday would be acceptable. James said that night would be better for him, as he had his last practice of the week that afternoon. Lily had nodded in agreement, and suggested they meet in the tower attic instead.  
  
James face flushed in embarrassment at this memory - though Lily obviously did not feel safe meeting him in the library, and did not want to dredge up recent memories, they still needed books for research.  
  
"I did some extra research on my own, and I think we should try and apply some of the spells and potions to the book. Besides, there are several extra copies of reference manuals already located in the storage space," she had concluded, formally and matter-of-factly. James remembered casting his eyes downward and nodding mutely in agreement. He could not bear to look at her.  
  
Now as he addressed his team high above the Quidditch pitch, he could not help but notice concern in the eyes of Belle and a few other players. First his insomnia came as the result of the death of his last remaining family member, now it came because dreams of the book and Evans haunted his sleep. Even so, he reasoned, a few black under eye circles and pale skin shouldn't affect his role as captain of the team, or the confidence his players needed to feel in him. He forced a smile as he talked, hoping it conveyed reassurance. Several people like Laura and Horace smiled back - but there was no fooling Belle. She squinted and surveyed him mercilessly.  
  
After landing and cleaning up in the lockeroom, James started back towards the castle donned in fresh jeans and a black tee shirt. His messy wet hair threatened to freeze in the chilling wind. He took no notice.  
  
Upon entering the castle, he found a familiar figure leaning against a stone column, perhaps awaiting his return. His face remaining stoic, he greeted him.  
  
"Hello Lucius," James muttered.  
  
A large smile grew on the face of Malfoy, much like that of the Cheshire cat. His ice blue eyes lit up with a sick twisted glee. "Well hello Potter," he replied. "I've been waiting for you," he added.  
  
"I can't imagine why," James replied. "Don't you have some eleven year old to torture mercilessly or some death quota to fill for the day? Or perhaps you need to go work on you dueling skills?" he suggested, rubbing salt in Malfoy's wounded pride.  
  
Lucius winced a bit at the dueling reference, but otherwise the sick smile stayed plastered on his face. James, observing his face and looking into his eyes came to a resolute but disturbing conclusion that there was madness lurking there. Power, brilliance, yes - but madness as well.  
  
"Let's cut with the small talk Potter, and let me get right to the point. I have little time to spare this evening. It has come to my attention that you and I have a mutual dislike for a certain someone-"  
  
James opened his mouth to interrupt but Lucius held up his hand to stop him from speaking until he was finished.  
  
"Please let me just finish first. Now I am aware that you Gryfinndors have a habit of developing his nobility complex and frolicking off to do whatever you think will make a world a happy shiny place - and I have to be honest it is horribly annoying. Also I am aware that you and your friends have been responsible for causing me grief in the past, and possibly in my current situation, although I must admit I know not to what degree," he added, studying James' face for signs of guilt, then continuing -  
  
"But despite all that, there is this thorn in my side that just keeps on distracting me from what is currently my more important business. This dueling club incident has been quite an ordeal, and I intend on delivering retribution. Plus she has the nerve to speak to me as if she were my equal! It is unbearable. My father insisted I keep an eye on the filthy creature, why he would suggest such a thing I am puzzled and disgusted. She poses no danger, she is a worthless and talentless Mudblood. But I have noticed that she and you have taken a severe disliking to each other. Seeing as you are quite closer proximity to her, may I suggest that it may be beneficial to us both if she had to leave Hogwarts, and that I possess means to that end? Despite your faults, you do come from a respectable pureblood family - "  
  
James, suddenly in his fatigue understood that Lucius seriously wanted his help in destroying Lily, and began laughing. Having been interrupted in midsentence, Lucius looked at him in surprise. James also realized that Lucius needed his help, needed someone close to Lily in order to pull off his plan. Was that all he had? He obviously had not been informed of Lily's family history, or her significance. He started laughing even harder.  
  
The absurdity of Lucuis Malfoy assuming he would help him out, the fact that Lucuis was at this very moment obviously clueless it was the "filthy Mudblood" who had outsmarted him and taken his book, (although it was only a matter of time before he put two and two and eight together) and the suggestion he would ally himself with such scum caused him to laugh even harder.  
  
In fact, he was laughing so hard, he couldn't get out any words. Lucuis looked at him, dumbstruck. Recovering a moment later, Lucuis added in an offended manner: "I realize that the Potter family is very wealthy, and that since your parents death you possess that fortune, however I am also prepared to compensate you for your assistance-" but stopped in this sentence when it caused James to laugh even harder. In fact tears were gathering at the corner of his eyes. He bent over and used a pole to steady himself.  
  
To say his family had been rich was a huge understatement. To think that he would need Malfoy's financial assistance!  
  
James looked at Malfoy. Here was the person whose family and dark circle may have been responsible for the death of people he knew and loved. He smiled for a moment, reveling in the thought he would be part of bringing forth his demise. He would help to destroy the Malfoy family. And Lily, the very person Lucius cast so easily aside, was going to help him do it. He chuckled once more at the irony, and started to walk away, giving Lucius a pat on the shoulder as he walked by, as if in thanks for the good laugh.  
  
Malfoy looked furious. "How dare you! How dare you laugh at -" but his voice faded away as James walked onward, never favoring him with a glance back. He wondered if he himself was the mad one, he certainly felt quite lightheaded. The voice caught up with him in one loud statement.  
  
"Watch your back Potter." The threat had come from the obvious source, now stalking away in a swish of robes.  
  
James, dragging his equipment with him, began his climb up the stairs and to the common room.  
  
*  
  
Lily watched the fire. She had been watching it for well over twenty minutes white purposefully neglecting her homework. Eva was too busy with their own to notice her distraction, and for that she was grateful. Soon Belle would be back from practice, and so would he.  
  
Lily felt the rejection of James deeply, and she couldn't explain why. Of course there was him becoming horrified after their encounter, looking disgusted and verbalizing such sentiments. Then there was his continued dismissal of her, even silence during Divination. He didn't bother even to insult her.  
  
There was extreme frustration for Lily in these events. She had not wanted to become deeply involved with James, or have a relationship with him. She wasn't even sure that she liked him as a human being yet, or that she could stand his presence.  
  
What she thought she felt - and found out that she was greatly mistaken in - was that somehow, someway, he needed her. That he wanted to be close to her, that he desired nothing more than her touch and attention. Obviously she had been wrong, and embarrassingly so. But in that moment in the library, she thought she felt him calling to her silently. Lily could see that he was in pain, and that he had been for a long time. And she wanted to make it stop, to hold him and tell him that she would fix everything.  
  
But no, she had been horribly wrong. She disgusted him. She horrified him and the times in which they were close were nothing but a trial for his patience. Potter would need her for the book and its contents that that was all.  
  
Lily resigned herself to this fact as the portrait door swung open, and in he stepped.  
  
*  
  
James saw that the place near the fire was occupied by Lily and Eva, so he chose some oversized chairs on the opposite side of the room, facing away from the two girls. He pulled out his book for Defense Against the Dark Arts and began to read. He had covered most of the chapter discussing the different levels and effects of various stunning spells when his mind began to drift.  
  
He saw Sirius at a desk in the corner, drawing out what looked to be some kind of blue print or plan. He assumed it had something to do with the dance and his plot to pull a huge practical joke. He was completely enthralled with whatever it is he planning, and had one arm wrapped around the parchment as to shield it from the view of passer-bys.  
  
Remus was nowhere to be found. It was getting later, and he would be spending the night in the Shrieking Shack. However, this time James, Sirius and Peter would not be joining him. Peter had fallen ill, and Sirius had a detention with Flich. James shuddered. Sirius had been told to bring his toothbrush, he did not even want to consider what he would be forced to scrub. With just one of them there, James could not guarantee his or others safety. So Remus was on his own, and James also had the night all to himself.  
  
He saw a flash of red from across the room. Lily was readjusting herself in the chair, settling down in order to just gaze into the fire. A useless book sat in her lap. She looked deep in thought, her hand was figeting with the sleeve of her shirt.  
  
The dark haired boy looked away and closed his eyes. He remembered the library, and how he had leaned against the bookcase, eyes shut, holding himself under control, pushing down his emotions. How he had assumed once she had the book he misplaced she would leave him alone, with his thoughts.  
  
His eyes were shut. He could feel his supporting arm trembling, he hand reaching up to check for fever or sickness. Her voice, asking him if he was all right. The hand being so soft and smooth, a texture he didn't think applied to human skin, like a satin ribbon.  
  
Her breath on his face, sweet and warm in the chilled library.  
  
His name. She had whispered his name. James.  
  
The simple act of her lip brushing his and the wave of desire that crushed him and glued him to the spot, enabling him to move as she wrapped her lips softly around his bottom one.  
  
For so long he had wanted to touch her hair. He was receiving visual memory images of her cheeks and eyelashes, the feel of her fingers gripping his back.  
  
He slammed the book shut. It would not do to concentrate here, or anywhere else she was. He would have to rid himself of Lily Evans, purge his system and soul of her memory, of her image, of her taste.  
  
Unsure of where to go, James aimlessly left the common room, unsure of where to go, of what to, of how to ultimately escape Lily. 


End file.
